Testimony
of Dr. Gloria Polo Ortiz
Very well, brothers and sisters, blessed be the
Lord. It's a miracle that I am here with you sharing this beautiful gift that I
received from the Lord, 10 years ago. This occurred on
It started pouring rain. We only had a very small
umbrella with us. My nephew and I went under the umbrella. We started jumping
over puddles. When we jumped to avoid stepping into a very large puddle, we
were struck by lightening. My nephew and I were killed by the lightening. My
nephew's interior organs were completely burned, charred, but his exterior was
left intact. He suffered cardiac arrest and he did not respond to the
paramedics' attempts to resuscitate him. The lightening burned me horribly. The
lightening entered through my arm. It burned my breasts. My breasts were
completely gone. It removed all of the flesh from my stomach and my
reproductive organs. My legs were totally and completely charred, I mean
completely. The lightening exited through my right foot.
As far as the interior of my body, my liver was
completely charred, as well as my lungs and my kidneys. My kidneys were gravely
burned. I used to use the IUD as a form of birth control. You want to know the
words that the doctors used to describe my ovaries? "Your ovaries look
like raisins." The doctors told me, "You'll never have children
again." My ovaries were burned and I was in cardiac arrest.
The difference is that when the doctors attempted
to do artificial resuscitation on me, the Lord allowed me to return to my body.
The doctors told my family, "Look, there is nothing that we can do for
Gloria. The best thing to do is to allow her to continue her process of agony
and allow her to die peacefully."
At that very moment, I was taken out of surgery
and I entered into a period of agonizing. The doctors told my family,
"It's best if you do not hook her up to life support." You want to
know the irony about that, brothers and sisters? I used to defend euthanasia,
the right to die with "dignity." But thank God, God inspired my
sister, who is an M.D., and when the doctors told her not to hook me up, she
responded by saying, "You are not God." For three days I was in a
deep coma. I was alive because they had me hooked to an oxygen tank and they
were giving me artificial life, otherwise I would have died right there.
At that point, the Lord tells me to go back. When
he tells me to go back, immediately - my kidneys did not work and I was pale.
And they wouldn't put me on dialysis because it was not worth it. I was dying -
immediately my kidneys begin to work again and my lungs and my heart begin to
beat again with normal strength. They transferred me to Social Security (that's
a hospital). There they scraped the flesh that was burned. They were very surprised.
They never imagined that I would come back there alive. The pain was so
excruciating that I couldn't be comfortable, not even for a second. It hurt me
even to breathe. I was in pain interiorly and exteriorly. One feels horrific
pain when they are scraping those burned areas. Everything is raw flesh. My
legs were black like dead tissue. When the doctors would clean my legs, I'd
feel no pain. From my legs down, I felt no pain.
About a month later, they tell me, "Look,
Gloria, the Lord is doing a miracle in you. The wounds are almost completely
healed, you have dents and scars, but new skin has already formed. But
unfortunately there is nothing we can do for your legs. We must amputate
them." When they told me that they were going to amputate my legs -- I was
very athletic. I was into aerobics. When they told me that they were going to
amputate my legs, I thought, "I must escape." As soon as the doctor
walked out of the room, I tried to get out of bed to escape but my legs did not
support me and I slipped like a frog. I ended up on the floor. I had to be
picked up. They moved me from the fifth floor to the seventh floor. You want to
know who I ran into, brothers and sisters? I ran into a lady whose leg had been
amputated up to here and they were going to amputate a little higher. When I
saw that they had amputated her legs, I asked myself, "How much money in
the world can buy us a pair of legs?" Not the entire money from the world
can buy us a pair of legs. Our legs are a marvel. When they were going to amputate
my legs, I became very sad. I never thanked God for my legs. On the contrary, I
used to torture myself because of my tendency to be a little heavy. I used to
starve myself. I used to spend a lot of money, a fortune, a small fortune, on
diets to make myself look thin. And now I see my legs all skinny, black and
burned with holes in them. And for the first time in my life I thanked God for
my legs.
And I said, "Lord, I thank you for this
second opportunity that you've given me. Thank you, Lord. I do not deserve it.
But I want to ask you for a favor, Lord, a tiny favor. Please do not take away
my legs, just so that I can be a little mobile and so that I'll be able to
stand a little bit. Please, Lord, do not take away my legs. Please." And I
began to feel a sensation in my legs, brothers and sisters. And those legs that
were black and without circulation and full of blisters began to turn red. And
when the doctors returned on Monday, my legs were red. The circulation had been
restored. When the doctors came down to see me, I got out of bed and my legs
were able to sustain me. The doctors were totally surprised. They would look at
each other; they would touch me. I had recuperated a lot of other movements and
my legs had lost that black color and now they were red. And I told the doctor,
"My legs hurt so much. There has never been anyone on this earth to be so
happy to feel such excruciating pain on their legs like me."
You want to know what the director of the seventh
floor told me? He said, "You know what, in my 38 years of service, I have
never seen such a miracle like that of your legs." And here are my legs,
brothers and sisters. My gait has changed but for the glory of God here they
are to show you the greatness and the power of a living God, a God that is
alive. Another one of the great miracles that the Lord did with me is, I had no
breasts. My breasts had been completely burned. And imagine this, I was very
prideful. I used to say, "A woman has to show off her best assets."
And I used to say, "Since my breasts, and my legs, and my abdominals are
my best assets, why not show them off." I was always showing off that I
had great abdominals. I used to wear very low-cut blouses to show off my
breasts. I was very proud of my legs. Well, brothers and sisters, those were
the parts that were completely burned and charred.
And here goes the next miracle. The doctor that
used to be my trainer, as far as sports and diets were concerned -- just
imagine I used to be very prideful and vain. I used to starve myself to look
thin and I used to consume hormones to lose weight and drugs to lose weight --
now here I was before the very doctor, who always took care of my body
so-to-speak, now here I was before him totally charred. The doctor could not
believe it. He was more shocked about the fact the he knew how prideful and
vain I was and now here I was just grateful to God to be alive and to have
whatever was left of my body.
The doctor tells me, "You know what, Gloria,
I think that with that little piece of liver that's left, you should be able to
live." He had performed on me nuclear exams and all kinds of exams.
"But your ovaries are complete burned up. You will never be able to have
children again."
Within me I thought, "Thank you, Lord. Now I
don't have to worry about birth control. I can use the natural family planning
method. Glory to God. You have solved this problem for me, Lord. Thank you. I
was very happy to hear that."
About a year and a half later, I began to notice
that my breasts began to form again and I begin to feel pain in my breasts. I
used to think, how weird that I have breasts. Well, you want to know why? Well,
I was pregnant, with charred ovaries and all. God gave me my breasts back and I
was able to breastfeed my daughter. Her name is Maria Jose. And I know I'm
pressing on quickly, but those are the great miracles. And immediately my
menstruation was restored, and my hormones were restored, and my ovaries began
to function. Those are the physical miracles that the Lord has done with me.
But the best part, brothers and sisters, is when I
was jumping to avoid the puddles and lightening struck me, my God, I wish I had
words to express to you and to help you understand the beauty of it. I jumped
and I was struck by lightening and immediately I entered into a beautiful
light, so, so, so, white and beautiful that nothing exists in this world for me
to compare it to. There is nothing humanly possible to describe it. I saw a
beautiful sun, such peace, such joy, such happiness that is felt there. How beautiful
death is, brothers and sisters. I don't know why we've been taught to think of
death as a form of punishment. I can describe that light as a hug from our
Heavenly Father. There I am engulfed in that beautiful light, filled with
endless love.
When I'm up there, I immediately see my charred
body bouncing like a piece of rubber. I saw the body of my nephew laying there
also charred. At that instant, I saw all the persons in the world, all of
humanity, at eye-level. I didn't even have to move. I was free from time and
space. I could see the sins that each person carried within them. The love that
I felt there in that light was so great that it overflowed through me. And I
started hugging all the people because I wanted all of humanity to feel this
great love that was inundating me. But only my older daughter, my 9-year-old,
was able to feel the hug that I gave her. Outside of her, no one else felt the
hug.
When I saw my body laying there charred, I said,
"Crap, I am dead." And I immediately thought, "My children. What
are they going to say about a mother who never had time for them." I used
to leave my house at
When I am going up, higher, and higher, enveloped
in that love, in that joy, I saw my dad; I saw my mom, my grandparents, my
great-grandparents. I saw many of my relatives. I saw my great-grandmother,
whom I got to know when she was 100-plus years old, because back then people
lived longer. When I was up there, I discovered that I had wasted a lot of
money, doing regressions. Such was the shrewdness of the devil, that for a
period of time I believed in reincarnation. I didn't find out where my
great-grandmother had reincarnated to because it was very expensive to do so.
All of that is false. My great-grandmother was up there in heaven.
When I'm up there in that beautiful light, in what
I described to you already as a hug from our Heavenly Father -- to me it was
beautiful because over there, there was no time or space for me. I saw my
nephew that had died, the 23-year-old orthodontist. I saw when he hugged his
mom. His mom was mopping and when he hugs her, she grabs her heart and she feels
unbearable pain. She throws herself on the floor from that heartache. And when
she hits the ground, she begins to roll over due to the emotional pain. And she
yells out, "No, God, no. Do not do this to me because I will not be able
to bear it." She had never shared that experience with anyone. When I was
out of the hospital, I told her, "Remember when you threw yourself on the
floor and you would say that you could not bear the pain, that's when your son
was hugging you, at that very instant."
When I was up there, I saw a beautiful, beautiful,
indescribably beautiful lake, two extremely beautiful trees. The beauty that
exists up there is so indescribable. There is so much light and so much love.
It's a love that is alive. And the peace that exists up there is indescribable
peace. It's so joyful being up there, brothers and sisters. As I am getting
closer and closer to the very top, I hear my husband's voice say, "Gloria,
please, do not be a coward. Come back. Come back, the children, Gloria, the
children."
At that moment, I came to a standstill. I looked
down and I saw him crying and bleeding. He was not burned directly by
lightening. He was shocked with the electricity that was left in the water. He
was also being tossed like a rubber band, like my nephew and I were. My husband
says that we were being tossed into the air with such force that we were seven
meters up in the air. When I looked at him and I saw him crying and bleeding, I
was sent back. What sadness! When I am being told to go back, I saw that my
nephew entered into the garden and he went like this to me. He enters filled
with joy. But I was sent back. It was very clear, brothers and sisters, that I
was not going to enter into that garden.
All persons, except those who commit suicide,
experience the hug, that light, from our Heavenly Father, that's why everyone
who dies sees a light, and the love, and the peace that is felt there. Our
Heavenly Father hugs every single person that dies because he loves us all. He
shows us how great his love for us is. But since our Heavenly Father does not
force anyone --and if we chose, here on earth, to live without God, if God is
love and I am hatred, then who is my father? After our Heavenly Father allows
us to experience His hug, he must turn us over to the father that we have
chosen to be with, for eternity. He will not force us to anything. If we have
lived a life without Him here on earth, he will not force us to spend eternity
with him. He turns us over to where we freely chose to be for all eternity.
I was sent back. I found my body without life. I
was in a gurney at the
At that moment, brothers and sisters, what an
impressive moment, I saw many, many persons coming out of the walls of the
surgery room. They appeared to be normal human beings, but they had such hatred
coming out of their eyes and evil looks. When I saw those human beings, I came
to know that those were all my sins that I had committed since my last
sacramental confession; that is, confession with a priest. I see all of my sins
come out. I went out of there running, trying to escape. I don't recall at what
moment this happened, but I went right through the wall of the surgery room.
When I went through that wall, I automatically jumped into a void. I began to
descend from the light into the darkness. I began to go through a whole bunch
of like cells, like jails. There are millions and millions of persons there. It
was as though it were many jails, mazes and honeycombs.
Up there, where the light was, brothers and
sisters, you should see how beautiful the people look. Their vestments were as
though they were wearing the sun. The persons that were way at the top were so
beautiful that you couldn't even see their faces clearly. They looked so
beautiful. You can imagine the happiness I felt when I saw my mother up there,
where there was light. My mother had passed away years ago. Those beautiful
white vestments that my mother was wearing looked like the sun. I was given the
understanding that those are the Eucharists that my mother had consumed
throughout her entire life; therefore, she was dressed in the Lamb.
I wasn't able to stay with my mother. I continued
descending. It continued to get darker. The people down there are deformed.
Sin, brothers and sisters, scars you. It leaves a scar. Your soul gets scarred,
like with burns and dents. When I continued descending through those tunnels
and jails, the smell that comes out of there is horrifying. It's an
impressionable odor. It was horrific for me, brothers and sisters, to see that
the worst stench of all was coming out of me. How much money did I spend
throughout my life on expensive perfumes? I used to loathe bad odor. When I
discovered that those sins from which I was running away, those sins were not
in my exterior. You want to know what the most horrifying thing was? It was
seeing that those sins dwelt within me. I looked like a demon, like the Beast.
It was horrible. Just like my mother was dressed of the Lord, I was dressed of
the Beast, like a black bag of trash, that's how I was enveloped in those
things. All of those things cried out within me and lived within me. In
desperation, I tried to escape. I screamed horrified by those things. They
would laugh within me.
When I was coming to the end of my descending, I
ended up in a place where there were swamps. There were millions and millions
of people buried in those swamps. The people in those swamps were buried up to
here. I was given the knowledge that the people in there were the people who
had given their bodies over to concupiscence, to pleasure. There were thousands
and thousands of miles of that mud. You want to know what that mud is? It's all
of the non-holy ejaculations. How many millions and millions of sperms get
released every time there is an ejaculation? All of that creates a horrible
swamp and darkness. And these people are in there being tortured by thinking of
every person whom they had relations with outside of the Sacrament of Marriage,
because that is the only holy relationship, the one in which Jesus is in their
midst, which is only through the Sacrament of Marriage. Outside of that, even
if you are the only couple in existence, those are ejaculations outside of the
grace of God and every person with whom they had intimate relations with are in
there stuck with them in that swamp. The shame and pain that they feel there is
of a horrifying magnitude.
I saw my father there, buried in that mud. He was
screaming in pain. I felt excruciating pain to see my father there. And I said,
"Daddy, what are you doing here?" My dad crying answers me,
"Daughter, adultery, adultery."
When it's your turn to go there, you will remember
me. Pay attention to what I am about to tell you. You want to know what hurts
you the most when you are there, brothers and sisters? What hurts the most when
you are there is to see God so in love with us. He's after us our whole life.
When I was there, our Lord showed me how many priests came to my rescue; he
showed me every single person who had a prayer life that approached me to
invite me to pray, including the nuns who used to extend to me an invitation to
conversion. You know what I used to say, "These witches," forgive me
I used to speak a lot of profanity, "those old witches, those blood
suckers, leeches, those menopausal-bitter witches want to ruin my life by
telling me how to live my life. Who do they think they are?"
When you are over there being judged, it's your
thoughts that speak the loudest. You re-live your life because our Lord opens
the Book of Life and he goes over your entire life with your and so you re-live
every second of it. You see your life go before you, including what your
thoughts were at that moment in your life. And when you act in certain manners
you see all the people that were damaged or hurt due to your actions at that
instant of your life that is being shown to you in the Book of Life. It's very
painful. Our Lord shows us how our sins do not simply stay within us. Like a
rotten fruit, if it's not removed, it will rot all the fruit around it. If I
allow sin in my life, what is the closest thing to me that is going to get
damaged? My children.
You know what, brothers and sisters, remove those
earplugs from your ears because I want you to hear this, when you fall into
mortal sin, the devil compromises you and you sign your soul over to the devil.
And your soul immediately becomes the devil's possession. Once we do that, the
saddest part is that the devil tells us, "Now, bring me all those around
you."
A mother who is always gossiping, a father who is
filled with hatred, or unfaithfulness, or a drunkard, what is the closest thing
that he or she has? His or her children. The Lord calls that the bad
administration of the talents that the Lord gives a father and mother to
inculcate to their children graces of salvation. Every time that my biological
brothers would get drunk and would be sleeping around with women other than
their wives, my dad, over there in those swamps, would scream and wail. My dad
felt a lot of pain when he was down there because he was given the
understanding that due to his lifestyle, he had handed his sons over to Satan
in a silver platter.
Unfortunately, my brothers did not live a
sacramental life. If we would have allowed ourselves to be guided by my mother,
it would have been different. My mom was taking us directly into the hands of
God. When one lives a sacramental life, God does not allow generational
bondages to be passed on. God breaks those chains. That's why God gave us the
Sacraments. But my family was not a sacramental one. We liked to party and
drink.
I'll never forget this. When I was three years
old, I was afraid of seeing my mom pregnant and the drunk father would arrive.
There was mother hiding her children, one here, one over there. I was put under
a table that had a tablecloth over it. My mom would tell me, "Sweetheart,
don't come out of there. Don't come out of there." I'll never forget when
one of my little brothers, out of fear, came out running from his hiding place.
My dad grabbed him and beat him. My pregnant mother came out running to stop
him and he beat both of them up. I was under the table watching all of that
take place. That is inculcating sin. People nowadays call it traumatizing or
whatever. That is called to instill. A child will never forget something like
that. And sadly, the children of these parents end up repeating the same sins
as the parents.
That is why I would like to talk for just a minute
about the great blessing that the Sacrament of Marriage is. At this instant, I
am going to talk about adultery. One sometimes says, "Oh, if I only do it once,
it's not a big deal." In my country we call it "to have a gay time,
(canita a el aire.) I don't know what you call it in this country. Oh,
infidelity. But you know what, brothers and sisters? When somebody is going to
get married and you enter the church, and at the altar you declare that you are
going to be faithful in good times and in bad times, through sickness and
health, you want to know whom you are promising that to? You are making that
promise to the Blessed Trinity. When it's your turn to go up there and our Lord
goes over the Book of Life with you, you are going to find out, just like I
did, that God loves marriages. Our Lord gets very happy. He goes head over
heels over marriages. He loves it when a couple gets married. The only witness
is God the Father. And when our Lord shows you that in the Book of Life, you
see a gold tone, something of indescribable brightness. God the Father writes
down those words that you say at the altar in the Book of Life in that golden
tone. He is the witness. You drink the blood of the Lamb testifying to the pact
that one is making with God. Those words are being told to none other than the
Holy Trinity, just them.
When one breaks that pact, you cannot imagine, how
blessings are removed from your married life. When my husband and I received
the Eucharist, the body and blood or our Lord, you want to know what happened?
It's no longer a couple. It becomes three because immediately our Lord Jesus
incorporates the souls of the couple and he takes them into His heart. And it's
no longer three, but one because we become a trinity, the groom, the bride and
Jesus, in His heart. Who can separate that? No body. No body. Once the marriage
is consummated, if the young lady is pure, many, many graces and blessing get
poured upon them, more so upon the couple in which both of them are virgins
when they get married, because you are married to God.
When my father, slipped the ring into my mom's
finger, and they were declared husband and wife, our Lord Jesus handed over to
my father a staff of light, like this. Do you know what that is? It's a grace,
the gift of authority, which God bestows upon the father/husband, the authority
of God the father. That authority is to be used by the father/husband to guide
his little flock through this world, in which so many wolves exist that try to
devour marriages. My husband also received that staff, all men who are
sacramentally married do.
When my mother got married, she received a fire
upon her heart, like a humongous ball of fire. Do you know what that is? The
love of God. The beauty of it is that my mother was a very pure woman and God
was very pleased with her.
When my father was 12 years old, my grandfather
took him to the brothels. Can you imagine how many evil-worldly spirits entered
my father's soul? Those evil-worldly spirits look like larva to me. They're
like larva. When someone has relations outside of marriage, those evil-worldly
spirits immediately attach themselves to those persons all over their bodies.
They begin by attaching themselves to their genitals but they end up taking
over that person. They take over their hormones. They get into their brain.
They take over the hypophysis (pituitary gland). They take over the pituitary
gland. They take over the neurological part of their organism. And they begin
to generate a great number of hormones that leads them to very low instincts.
They turn a son or daughter of God into slaves of their genitals. And they
become genital human beings. They're enjoying life, excuse my language, if they
are wallowing in bed, in sin. When the couple is pure, many blessings get
poured upon them. God glorifies himself in that because the blood is there as a
pact of unity and sanctity between the couple.
Sexuality is not a sin, brothers and sisters. God
gave it to us as a blessing. He gave it to us for a couple to love each other.
True sexuality is the couple and God. When you get up there, you are going to
be shown too how the Holy Spirit is always in the sacramental bed because the
bed ends up being a sacrament of love, that is, in that bed exists the blessing
of the Sacrament of Marriage. And in that sacramental bed dwells the Holy
Spirit. God also leaves a cloud, that is, his presence in a home at the kitchen
table. If there isn't a table, he leaves a cloud over wherever the family gets
together to share a meal. God blesses. God loves going home with the couple.
When I got married, did I take God with me? No. I left him at the altar. I went
straight to the party, and then the honeymoon, and then we arrived home and our
Lord was left outside. But nonetheless he remained in the sacrament. That is
something that cannot be denied.
Back to my parents. The beauty of that matrimonial
blessing that my parents received is that the Lord was restoring within my father
many spiritual gifts because he was married to a pure woman and that was
healing my dad's inherited sexual bondages. But since he was a macho man and
his friends began instigating him; that he better not allow himself to fall for
a woman; that he had to continue living his party life. So what does my father
do? 15 days after his marriage, he ends up in a brothel to show off to his
friends that he continued being the macho man that he was before he got
married. Remember that staff that he had received at the altar, well, the Beast
stole it from him. That larva became attached to my father. He went from being
the shepherd of his home to a wolf.
While in those swamps, my father, crying would
say, "Thanks to those 38 years of prayer of that holy woman that God gave
me as a wife, my soul has been saved from eternal damnation." My mother
spent 38 years of her life praying for the salvation of my father's soul. Her
prayer went something like this - she would go before the Blessed Sacrament and
would say, "Lord, I know that you will not allow your servant to die
because I trust in you Lord, you will not allow this servant of yours to die
without seeing the conversion of her husband. I don't only pray for my husband,
but for all the poor women who are going through what I am going through. I
especially pray for the wives, who instead of kneeling before you in prayer,
are going to witch doctors, fortunetellers, or are doing the same thing as
their husbands, handing over their souls and the souls of their children to
Satan. I pray for them too, Lord."
You want to know why I loved my father, rather
than feeling hatred towards him? Because my mom was a good woman. She never,
never, never taught us to hate my father nor anyone, for that matter. I used to
say, there goes my mom again with her crazy stuff. She used to say, "The
Lord has revealed to me how the earth opened up and swallowed up your
father." That's how my mother would describe mortal sin, by saying that
the earth would open up and would swallow people up. But when I was up there, I
discovered that my mother did have a mystical vision. My mother used to tell
me, "I saw it. Satan has chained him. But you know what I do, daughter, I
hold on to him with the rosary. And I take him to church with me every day, tied
up with the rosary. And the devil pulls him downward and I pull him upward. And
I take him up to the Blessed Sacrament and I tell him, 'Here he is, Lord. And I
trust that you are going to save him.'"
My father converted eight years before he died. He
asked for forgiveness and God forgave him. That is why my father was in
purgatory, in the lower parts of purgatory, in the swamps. But my father did
not atone for his sins. To atone for our sins is something that we don't really
delve into very much and we cannot atone for anything, but Jesus in the
Eucharist can. When a soul goes to adore our Lord before the Blessed Sacrament,
he invites us and gives us the grace to repair the wrong that one has done.
It's a terrible thing because when you're over there, our Lord shows us the
consequences of our sins. Sin is not simply, oops, I stole something. When
you're up there, He will show you the damage that it causes others. What hurts
God the most is not the act of stealing, yes, that is bad, but what hurts him
the most is the pain that one causes one's brethren.
The Lord held me accountable even for a dirty look
that I gave someone. He held me accountable for a bad word that I said to a
brother. Those errors hurt so much when you are over there being judged. My mom
used to tell my dad to advise my brothers not to live a sinful life. My dad
would answer her by saying, "Sweetheart, let them enjoy life. The boys are
young. When they get older, the boys shall change their ways." How painful
it is for a father to turn his children over to eternal death.
When my mother conceived me, my soul brightened
her womb. It's a breath that God sends forth when the egg and the sperm unite.
An explosion occurs, a beautiful spark and my soul brightened up and it also
brightened my mother's womb. You want to know what else I saw, brothers and
sisters? Remember the huge sun, those are the open doors of heaven and that sun
is the Eucharist. There is NO OTHER WAY TO HEAVEN THAN THE EUCHARIST, brothers
and sisters. Memorize that. There is no other way to enter heaven than the body
and blood or our Lord. There is no other way.
That's why Satan hates Catholics so much and
confuses them so much. He loathes them. Because in the sanctuary are the open
gates to heaven. He comes out of the heart of Christ, which lives in the
sanctuaries. Now, tell me how many abandoned sanctuaries are there throughout
the world? Well, if you are from another religion/faith and you live
righteously according to what God has written in your heart - because God has written
in the hearts of everyone - if you've never known Christ, when that person is
dying Jesus cuddles up to that person. He cuddles up with every human being
when he or she is dying. He stands at their side and he shows them, "I am
your Lord." If the dying person accepts him as Lord, immediately - I can't
explain this very well - but immediately that soul is taken to some place in
the world where the Eucharist is being celebrated and that person receives the
Eucharist. Because only those who eat His flesh and drink His blood can enter
there. Outside of those who eat His flesh and drink His blood, no one else can
enter there. Something mystical occurs, through the grace of the Catholic
Church. We don't even know all of the treasures that we have within our own
church, brothers and sisters. There is a bank in heaven that administers the
graces that God has placed on the Catholic Church. Because of that bank, many
people who talk bad about the Catholic Church have received salvation and they
end up in purgatory. There they continue to receive Eucharistic graces. I saw
that with my soul.
I have to talk quickly. First Commandment, love
God above all else. I am focusing on adultery only. What can a person say when
he or she is before the Lord? "Lord, I love you above all things, above my
wife, above my husband, above my kids, but that secretary of mine is so fine,
Lord." And Second Commandment, not to swear or use the name of the Lord in
vain. When we get married, who do we make our promise to be faithful to? To God.
Right there I am breaking my promise. I am putting my Lord lower than my sin,
all the way in the corner. But when I'm in financial need, Lord, then I'll go
and say a rosary and you give me all the money that I need -- Observance of
holy days of obligation. The greatness and mercy of God who remains eternally
on the cross. Honor your father and mother, and I am only focusing on adultery
and I am doing it very quickly. What am I saying about my parents? That my
parents did not teach me to respect marriage. But how can a father tell his
son, "Son, if you are unfaithful, you will go to hell. Son, if you are not
going to be faithful to your wife, don't get married. Son, ask God for the
grace to be faithful." But how can a father advise his children in that manner
if he, himself, is unfaithful.
When a son calls his mother up and tells her,
"Mom, tell my wife that I was with you." And in reality where was he?
And the mother responds, "Very well, my son," and she doesn't bother
to give him advice or anything, that's when Satan makes us become accessories
to the crime/sin. It's a very grave matter when we become accessories to the
crime/sin. Now, the mothers-in-law, who butt into their children's marriages to
try to run it, you know what, if your son or daughter is already married, there
is nothing you can do. The only thing for you to do is to pray but keep your
nose out of their business. Many women have lost their salvation for getting
involved in their children's marriage. It's a very grave matter. If I see one
of them committing a sin, pray. Go before the Lord. But if my son is living in
sin, I can get together with the couple and say, "Look, please, save your
marriage, look at your children. Marriage is to give totally one to the other,
to fight together." What am I talking about? Fifth Commandment: Do not
kill. How many dead children are we carrying, dead to sin. We worry when our
children are sick or because they do not have money for college. And how many
of us have killed our own children through our sin and dare to say that we've
never killed, and our children walk around sad and depressed or filled with
anger because they don't have their mom or their dad with them. And when a
woman herself kills her own children, when she goes before the Lord and says, "Thank
you, Lord, for those wonderful children that you gave me. They were such good
children that ever since their father left me, they hate their father and they
only love me." Bang, you've killed them because to hate is to kill. How
many times have we poisoned our children's mind. You know what hurts our Lord?
When parents try to turn their children against their father or mother. God
does not allow that. When the husband goes before the Lord and He opens up the
Book of Life, our Lord is going to say, "Remember when you had relations
with this woman or with that secretary?" "Yes." "When you
had relations with that woman, even though you wore a condom, well, a virus
attached to it. You showered but the virus did not die. Later, when you had
relations with your wife, that virus attached to your wife and she ended up
with cancer." Who can say that adultery does not kill, physically? And
then we turn around and complain to God, "Why do you punish me."
Sixth Commandment, do not fornicate. I am only referring to adultery. How many
abortions occur due to adultery? "Oh, no. my husband is going to find out.
I have to kill the innocent baby that cannot speak."
Many people have told me, "God forgives
everything. Even murders can receive the Eucharist and just because I am having
fun, enjoying life, they do not let me receive the Eucharist." You know
what, Jesus is the rock that protects marriages. And when someone comes against
that rock, he or she is going to get smashed. That's what you are doing if you
destroy a marriage.
Do not steal. If I have so much money - people
have told me that they have so much money that their wives and children are
well off that they even have enough money to support another two women. That
money belongs to your family. If I have the blessing of the money that the Lord
provides for my family and I go out and spend it on prostitution, I am stealing
from God. And He will hold me accountable for it. You know what else the Lord
showed me, that we as females have run our husbands out of our beds. You know
what the Lord showed me, how when I was dating my husband I used to spend hours
on the phone with him and everything was "Love, this," "Honey,
that," "My life." And as soon as we got married it changed to
"That loser this," "That bum that," "That good for
nothing." The Lord showed me how I stopped being attentive towards my
husband. I used to say, "Forget it. Why should I? I have to work
too." The Lord showed me how many wives have run their husbands out of
their beds. Now, do not lie and do not give false witness. Now, tell me in an
adulterous relationship how many lies must be fabricated to cover it up?
Ninth Commandment, do not entertain impure
thoughts and do not covet the husband or wife of your neighbor. You know who is
very jealous? God is. If you think your wife is jealous, it's because you do
not know God. And do not covet your neighbor's goods. A married man is your
neighbor's belonging. He or she has an owner. He or she has children. He or she
has a home. What gives me the right to snatch that blessing away from them.
I wasn't even able to stay in the lower parts of
purgatory with my father. I continued descending. And when my descent came to
an end, I came to a flat surface. You can imagine the horror I felt when I
realized that I couldn't stop. I couldn't even stay in the last corner of
purgatory. I continued descending. When I came to that flat surface, a mouth
opened up. And that mouth swallowed me in. It was real. It was alive.
Everything is very real over there. That is reality. Over there, there is
nothing unreal. Everything is very real. And I go in there head first. When I
am on my way into another mouth, I was yelling and screaming like a crazy
person. I knew that once I entered in there completely that I wasn't going to
be able to stay in the cavity. I knew that I had to continue descending. That
hole had another mouth. And I knew that once I entered through that mouth, that
I would never come out. It was my spiritual death, the death of my soul. But
when I am headed towards that mouth, thanks be to God, St. Michael the
They were there waiting for their natural life
span to expire, the time they would have lived had they not committed suicide,
before descending to the place in hell where they will be spending eternity.
There is no time or space over there, but the people who commit suicide fall
out of Divine order. There were so many young people in there, so, so, so, so
many young people crying and gnashing their teeth over there. Their torment
there is seeing how their loved ones go about life feeling guilty, thinking,
"perhaps if I would have done this or if I wouldn't have done that, or if
I would have dealt with it differently maybe this wouldn't have happened."
That's how demons torment them.
What those poor people need is that those, who are
still here on earth, that they begin converting. That's what the people need
over there, conversion, acts of charity, such as visiting the sick, that they
offer up the Eucharist for them, because everything gets transformed over
there. The blessings are given through the Eucharist. How can a poor soul in
purgatory come out of there? It can't. What can someone who is stuck in that
hole, like I was, do for themselves? Absolutely nothing. But God can through
the Eucharist. Those poor souls need masses offered up for them.
But the demons over there enjoy torturing those
souls by showing them how their loved ones are hurting for them. And those poor
souls, as it is, are going through so much anguish already even without the
torture from the demons. When I saw them in such anguish, I began to yell out,
"Please, you made a mistake. I have never stolen. I have never killed. I
have never hurt anyone. I used to buy groceries for the poor. I used to pull
teeth out for free for the poor." I was demanding my rights. Everywhere I
went I always demanded my rights. I would yell out, "This is too much. I
was on my way to heaven. What am I doing here?" And I began saying,
"Before our bankruptcy, for five years, I used to pull teeth out for free
for the poor and I used to use the best Swiss products on them. What am I doing
here? Get me out of here." I would yell out as I was surrounded by those
horrible creatures. I began yelling out, "I'm a Catholic. Please get me
out of here."
When I yelled out that was a Catholic, I saw two
lights. I saw these lights like on a ladder. One of those lights was my father.
He barely had any light about him. His light was very dim. And the other light
was my mother. She had so much light about her. Her light was bright and
beautiful. I felt so much joy. I thought to myself, they're here to get me out
of here. At that moment, my body in the hospital, was in a comma. I was in an
agonizing state. There wasn't even enough oxygen entering my lungs anymore.
They would only allow my sister, who is a doctor, to be in there with me. She
was next to me in the hospital. But when I saw my parents over there - because
my spirit was with my flesh but my soul was in that hole. And I was in a deep
comma. And she clearly heard me speak. I had a tube going down my throat. Have
you ever heard a person, who is in a deep comma and with a tube down their
throat speak clearly? Well, I scared the daylights out of my sister. I began
saying, "Mom and dad are here. There here to take me with them." And
my sister got scared. She thought that I had died. She started saying,
"Mom and dad are here. They're here to take her. Go away mom and dad. Do
not take her. She has children. Do not take her." The doctors pulled her
out of the room because they thought that my sister was going into a state of
shock, you know, with the death of my nephew and my being in a comma. She spent
three days in the hospital without any sleep, the three days that I was in a
comma.
But when I was in that hole and I saw my parents
there, you cannot imagine the joy that I felt. I felt hope just by seeing a
little bit of light in the midst of that darkness. I began yelling out,
"Mom, dad, please get me out of here." They turn their eyes down
towards me and you should have seen the pain that their eyes reflected, what
pain. My father began to cry and he cried out, "No, oh, Lord, no, not my
daughter." My father cried with a lot of pain. My mother looked at me and
I could see the pain in her eyes, but nothing could remove the peace that she
had upon her. She didn't shed a tear. But she turned her eyes up and then she
looked down towards me.
At that moment, in horror, I understood that they
could not get me out of there. And I knew that they were there because they
were answering to our Lord how they had educated me, how they were the
guardians of the talents that God had given me, how they, through their lives
and through their testimony had preserved me from the attack of the enemy, how
they had taught me to love God, how they had fed the graces that God had placed
upon me through the Sacrament of Baptism. When I saw the pain that their eyes reflected,
especially my father, I began yelling and screaming, "Please get me out of
here. Please get me out of here. Please, please get me out of here. I shouldn't
be here. I am Catholic. I have no reason to be here." When I yelled out
that I was Catholic, I could hear a sweet voice, but so, so sweet, so sweet,
that everything was filled with peace and love at the sound of that voice.
Those horrible creatures had to prostrate themselves in adoration at the sound
of that voice. And they asked for permission to leave because they could not
stand the sweetness of that voice. And a mouth opened up underneath them and
they all went in there. And I felt peace as well as the other souls that were
in there. When I saw those creatures prostrate themselves there at the sound of
that voice, even Satan with his pride and all, they must prostrate themselves
before the King of kings and Lord of lords. I saw the Blessed Virgin Mary
prostrated at mass, when the priest was holding up the Eucharist at my nephew's
funeral, praying for me, bringing all of the prayers of my hometown and placing
them at the feet of my Lord. When the priest holds up the Eucharist, everything
has to prostrate themselves in heaven, on earth and under the earth. All the
demons at that very moment have to prostrate themselves. And at mass during
that special moment, I used to be dosing off or chewing away at my gum. You
want to know what my relationship with God was. "He's deaf. He doesn't
hear me. What's wrong with him?" Imagine that, trying to manipulate God.
And that voice tells me, "Very well, if you
are Catholic, tell me the 10 commandments of God's Law." And the only
thing I knew is that there were 10 of them. I was scared. I said, "Crap,
what do I do now. How do I get out of this one." I thought, I know what
I'm going to do, I am going to repeat what my mom taught me. She used to say,
"Whoever loves God, need only count to one. Whoever loves their brethren,
loves God." I began planning a great speech to get myself out of that
mess. And I'm trying to kill time to organize that in my head. That is how
daring sin is. And I said, "The first commandment: to Love God above all
else and to love your neighbor as yourself."
And that beautiful voice tells me, "Very
well, and have you loved him?"
I responded, "I have. I have."
When He said, "No," brothers and
sisters, all of my saintly masks went down the toilet, all of them. I was
'naked' before the Lord.
That sweet voice said to me, "No. You have
not loved your Lord above all else, nor have you loved your neighbor as
yourself. You created a God that you conformed to your ways, instead of you
conforming to the ways of the Lord. You only remembered the Lord in times of
need, in times of suffering. The only time that you would prostrate yourself
before Me was during those hardships, and only then. You would promise to pray
novenas, to go to mass, to go to bible studies and prayer meetings.
That sweet voice would say to me, "Nothing
was given to you because you asked for it. It was given to you as a blessing
from me. But you never kept any of the promises you made. You would promise to
have masses said, you promised so many things but never followed through."
From there on, everything I ever said was brought
to light, "You gave your word to your Lord and you never kept it. You made
a vow with your Lord and you never kept it. You only looked for the Lord when
-- I would say, "Lord, please, grant me a car, even if it's an old car,
just so that I can move around." This is one of the many things that I
prayed for that the Lord showed me when I was up there. The Lord would also
show me how as soon as he blessed me with the car, within eight days, I began
to complain. I never thanked God for blessing me with the car. The Lord kept on
showing me how he would pour blessings upon me and I never thanked him for
anything.
The Lord told me, "That is because you had a
God. That idolatry that has you here and that God was money."
When I was told that money was my God, I responded
by saying, "What money? I left nothing but debts on earth." That's as
far as I was permitted to speak. After that the Book of my Life was opened up.
Brothers and sisters, what beauty. When it's your turn to go before the Lord
and he opens up the book of your life, you are going to see everything in there
from the very instant of your conception until your last breath. From there on
you begin to see your life moment by moment. You see how white, radiant, and
completely filled with God's love your soul is. Have you ever seen babies
laughing by themselves and it seems as though they are talking and some adults
say that they are talking with God? Well, yes, they are. Babies are submerged
in the Holy Spirit like all of us, but they do know how to enjoy the presence
of God.
You cannot imagine how beautiful it was to see
myself in my mother's womb. My mom hadn't been able to have children for seven
years and she could not believe that she was pregnant. My mother was getting
closer to the heart of Jesus, but she had to go through a process, like we all
do. She was very disturbed due to my father's lifestyle. Then when she finds
out that she's pregnant all she would say was, "No, my God, please, do not
let me be pregnant." She would cry. That generated interior anguish within
me. I grew up thinking that my mother did not love me and it always created a
rejection in me towards my mother. Mother was a woman who was God-filled.
Everybody loved her. She was so kind to me and I used to think she didn't love
me. "She doesn't love me. She doesn't love me." It was weird. But
that's why we have the sacraments, the grace of the sacraments.
In the Book of Life, I saw when I was baptized.
When I was baptized, you should have seen the big party that took place in
heaven. I was a baby and a mark was placed on me right here. When your turn
comes to go up there, you are going to see the mark that the children of God
have on them. It's a fire. It's the fire that shows that we belong to Jesus
Christ.
But in the Book of Life, the Lord began to show me
how I began to get filled with the sins that were around me since I was a
little girl, mainly due to my father's lifestyle. The lies, the drunkenness and
that whole lifestyle that I was starting to adopt, how it generated many bad
things in me, many behaviors that were expressed in me throughout my life.
When I was being shown the book of my life, I saw
all the beautiful talents that were placed in my interior. Brothers and
sisters, we are all worth so much. You have no idea how much we are worth to
God. He loves each and every one of us. One of the things that worries the
devil the most is when we begin to put those talents that God has placed in us
to good use; that is, (to the service of the Lord). If we would put those
talents to work, this world wouldn't be in the shape that it's in. At that
instant, the Lord asks me, "What spiritual treasures have you brought
me?" My hands were empty!
At that moment the Lord asked me, "What good
was it for you to say that you owned apartment complexes? What good was it for
you to own your own practice? What good was it for you to say that you were a
successful professional woman? Tell me, what good was all of that? What good
was it for you to workout so much worship of your body, so much torture that
you put your body through? What good was it for you to become bulimic and
anorexic. What good was it for you to put your body through so much? Were you
able to bring the dust of a brick over here? What good was it for you to have
so many people adore you? Because you made a god out of yourself by being
generous and giving so much, because you did many generous things and many acts
of charity for people to think that you were such a good person, such a holy
person, thus you made a god out of yourself. And you used to manipulate people
with your money and you would make them do whatever you wanted them to do. Tell
me, what have you been able to bring with you over here?"
Our Lord continued saying to me, "When I
blessed you with bankruptcy, I did that to draw your attention away from that
god (god of money) that has you here now, that god whom you served. I did that
for you to turn to me, but instead you rebelled against me. You refused to step
down from your social status and you used to curse me. You were enslaved to
your god, that money god.
He said to me, "You had everything and
everything was given to you as a blessing. It's not the way you used to think,
'It's because I am so intelligent. I'm a hard worker. I am very
studious.'"
I used to say, "I became successful through
my hard work, my ability to study, and my efforts."
The Lord said to me, "No. Look, how many
professionals exist in better economic conditions than you? How many
professionals exist that labor so hard and look at their poor condition? But
you were given much and because you were given much, much will be asked of
you."
I had to answer to the Lord even for every grain
of rice that I threw away in my life. Every time that I threw food away, I had
to answer to the Lord. He begins to point out to me out of the book of my life
how my mother used to always make beans, because as a child, I was very poor.
And I was so sick of eating beans all the time that I hated them. I used to
say, "Not, damned beans again. Some day I am going to be so rich that I
will never eat beans again." One day when I was just a small child, I
threw away my beans. And my mother came to sit with me to have breakfast
together, but I had already thrown away the beans. My mother thought that I was
so hungry that I had already finished them.
You want to know what the Lord showed me over
there? He showed me the hunger that was the closest to me, that was my mother.
Imagine how hard it was. My mother had seven children. Many times she went
without eating anything so long as we had something to eat. We were very, very
poor. If not, my mother would give her food away to the needy. She went hungry
many times. But my mother always had a smile on her face. She never put on a
bitter face. The Lord showed me how that was the closest hunger that I had to
my life. From there on, the Lord began to show how I used to throw big parties
and social reunions with a variety of food. And people serve themselves more
than what they can eat and half of that food goes in the trash because they
can't eat all of it. The Lord would show me all of the food that would end up
in the trashcan. The Lord would say to me, "Look, at your brethren's
blessing. Look." The Lord raised his voice and said to me, "And I was
hungry." At that moment he showed me all the hunger that exists. It hurts
God very much to see people go hungry, to see people suffer, to see people in
need. He began to show me my own house (not her mother's house). He showed me a
vase that I had that had cost me a fortune. My housekeeper accidentally broke
that vase and I practically died. The Lord began to show me how many
fashionable and trendy clothes I had in my closet, how many costly and elegant
things I had in my house. And He says to me, "And I was naked." He
also showed me that it was pure vanity because I didn't use most of those clothes.
He showed me how my high-society friends -- this is during the time when I used
to have a lot of money and I used to live in high social status, before the
bankruptcy -- if my friends purchased clothes, I had to buy better clothes than
them. I was very envious. If somebody would purchase a car, I would begin
complaining about my car because I wanted something better than theirs. I was
always competing.
The Lord said to me, "You always looked up,
comparing yourself to people who were in a better financial position than you.
You never looked down again towards your poor brothers and sisters. When you
were poor, you were on your way to sanctity because you would give of what you
yourself needed." The Lord showed my how one time, even though we were
very poor, my mother bought me a pair of tennis shoes. I was really happy.
Then, I saw a boy barefooted and I felt very sad. I took off my shoes and I
gave them to the boy. When I arrived home, I arrived without shoes. My dad just
about killed me because it was such a sacrifice for my parents to buy me a pair
of shoes because we were so poor. He almost killed me. The Lord rejoiced
himself when I was walking that path. Even though I lived in a very complicated
home, graces were being poured upon us because of my mother's prayers and I was
on the path of sanctity.
The Lord said to me, "If you would have
opened up to the Holy Spirit, that little boy that you see there would not have
been molested by his father."
The Lord began to show me how all of humanity is
going to answer to God for a lot of the things that happen to others due to us
closing ourselves up to the Holy Spirit. The Lord said to me, "I would
have inspired you and you would have prayed. And that beast/demon that entered
into that person would not have molested that little girl or that little
boy."
The Lord also said to me and showed me, "If
you would have prayed, this young man would not have committed suicide. If you
would have prayed, this girl would not have aborted her baby. If you would have
prayed, this person would not have died feeling abandoned by me in a hospital.
I would have inspired you so that you would have started walking in that
direction, and I would have taken you, and you would have gone in MY NAME to
assist them."
He showed me the suffering of all the people in
the world. He said to me, "What pain, what pain." The Lord showed me
and he is going to show you too, when you go before him, how all of the talents
that he had given me were dormant. They never came out to service. And I never
allowed myself to be touched by the Holy Spirit so that I would have felt the
pain and suffering of others.
The Lord said to me, "Look at my people. Why
would you have to wait for your family to become ill with cancer in order for
you to pray for those who suffer from cancer? Why did you have to wait for your
husband to be kidnapped in order for you to pray for all those who get
kidnapped?" And he began to show me the pain that God feels when we do not
correctly administer the talents that He has given us. He said to me, "And
you, you had a heart of stone incapable of feeling pain."
At this point I would like to describe to you the
way in which the Lord showed me the talents. I used to never watch TV. I used
to say, "What for? All they show are a bunch of dead people." I used
to only watch the entertainment portion of the news, or when they talked about
"positive energy," and astrology, all of those tricks of the devil
that he throws out there, that is what I liked to watch. When I was over there
before him (being judged,) the Lord showed me how he had tried a strategy with
me. One time I turned on the TV just in time to watch my entertainment news and
all of that, and for some reason they were running behind, so instead of
entertainment news, I caught the tale end of the regular news. At that moment,
they were showing a lady farmer crying on top of her dead husband's body. When
I saw that -- you want to know what the devil sadly does to us? He makes us
indifferent to the pain of others. We become used to seeing dead people all the
time. We become used to seeing so much suffering. It no longer becomes our
problem instead we think it's too bad, but at the same time it's not our
problem. Well, let me tell you what the Lord showed me over there. The Lord showed
me all the pain that He felt because all of the reporters, who were covering
the story of the farmer that had been killed before his wife, were only
preoccupied with getting the best storyline, without even feeling any sorrow
for that poor farmer. They were only trying to sell the best story without
caring for the suffering of the poor wife.
When I was watching that on TV, I felt so much
pain and that caused me to pay attention. It happened in Benadillo, Tolima,
over there in my country. Immediately after they showed a spectacular diet that
was very popular at that time. The news of the diet took precedence over the
news of the lady farmer and her husband and never again did I remember her. Who
do you think asked me about that lady farmer? Who do you think didn't forget
about her? The Lord. When I was up there being judged, the Lord said to me,
"When you felt so much pain for that lady farmer, it was I inspiring you
to go to her aid. But you never kneeled before me, not even for a second to say
a prayer for her. You were so overtaken by the news of the diet that you forgot
all about the farmer." The Lord first showed me a farmer who was being
asked to leave the house in which he lived in. The farmer chose not to leave.
The Guerilla came armed with weapons. The Lord began to show me that farmer's
life in its entirety. The Lord showed me the fear that that farmer felt when he
saw the Guerilla approaching his house. The Lords showed me how that farmer hid
his wife and house children under some humongous pot-looking things. He wasn't
able to hide and the Guerilla chased after him. You want to know what his last
words were? "Lord, please, have mercy upon my children and my wife."
At that moment they killed him. The Lord showed me all that when I was before
Him being judged.
When they shot him, the Lord allowed me to feel
the pain that that woman felt. What did that woman feel and those children feel
who could not scream when they killed her husband and her husband falls dead before
their very eyes? That is how God shows to us the pain that He feels due to the
suffering of his children; and we walk around concerned only with our own
problems and our own needs.
You know what God wanted of me at that moment? He
only wanted me to kneel and to pray to him. And He had inspired me to do so.
You want to know what I had to do? All I had to do is walk a few steps and go
to the priest that was in front of me and tell him, "Father, I saw this
happen," and that priest was a friend of the priest in that town; that is,
the town where the man was shot to death in front of his wife and children, and
that priest ran a shelter for immigrants who had no place to live.
And that's the first thing that God is going to
ask us about. Before he even begins to ask us about our sins, he will first ask
us about the sins of omission. The sins of omission are so grave, so grave. You
have no idea, brothers and sisters, of the gravity of the sins of omission.
Sins of omission make God cry. And when you go before God, he's going to show
you how your communities and those around you suffer as a consequence of your
sins of omission.
And back to the lady farmer whose husband was
killed. The Lord showed me how they were now after her trying to kill her. And
she goes running out of there with her two children. And a priest tells her,
"Daughter, if you don't leave, they are going to kill you." And he
sent her to the most merciful city of
We were in our car and my son asks me,
"Mommy, how come that lady is wearing such a short skirt?"
I responded by saying, "Son, do not look at
those prostitutes. They're harlots. They're simply nobodies who sell their body
for pleasure." Without even knowing the reason why some women become
prostitutes, I responded to my son in such a manner. I poisoned his mind by
characterizing a fallen sister in such a miserable way. And she had fallen into
that lifestyle due to the indifference of others who did not lend her a helping
hand. The Lord showed all this to me when I was up there being judged. That's
why the Lord says that the indifferent human beings are the lukewarm that he
will spit out. An indifferent individual will NEVER enter heaven. An
indifferent individual is one who goes about life without caring for anything
or anyone outside of his or her home. The Lord told me that my spiritual death
began when my brothers' and sisters' (in Christ) pain stopped hurting me. At
that point, darkness began to fill me.
When I went to confession, I cried my sins. You
want to know what a confessional is? It's a washing machine for the soul. What
is the soul washed with? Not with water and soap but with the blood of the
Lord. I remember my soul being dirty as I walked into the confessional. You
want to know what I remember of the spiritual aspect of it? Okay. Well, the
Lord showed me that the gravest stains that I had in my soul, that rotted my soul
-- because it was terrible -- and that brought curses into my life, was to talk
bad about the priests.
The Lord showed me, when I was up there, how in
the wound of the hearts of the priest -- because every priest is anointed with
a wound in his heart, and in that wound lives the Lord on the cross, and it
bleeds continuously and that's the blood that cleanses our sins. When a soul
goes to confession, there are things going on outside of human knowledge, but
they are very real in the spirit. At that moment, the soul gets lifted up to
the mercy of God, that is, to the door of mercy. And the soul gets lifted up
there and in the wound that exists in the hearts of priests, Jesus puts his
cross there bleeding in his eternal present and the soul gets lifted up there.
Even though these things are beyond human understanding, they are very real,
vividly real. My soul and everybody's soul gets washed clean. And every sin
that I confessed, our Lord tore up the payment that belonged to Satan.
Brothers and sisters, I do not recall if I already
told you that when those demons finally left me, there was only one demon that
did not leave. He was allowed to stay, with our Lord's permission. He is the
one that would cry out, "She's mine. She's mine." It cried out
horribly, "She's mine. She's mine." It was a big demon. That demon is
the one that planned out and strategized the destruction of my soul. With a
well-planned strategy, it manipulated the destruction of my soul. It took
advantage of my weaknesses and sent sin into my soul, that is why it had
permission to stay. That demon had permission to stay because I died in mortal
sin, and that goes for everyone who dies in mortal sin. I had not been to
sacramental confession since the age of 13, that is, confession with a priest.
And that demon would do nothing else but cry out for my soul and accuse me
before the Lord. It cried out, "She's mine." And you can imagine, the
Lord is going over my whole life with me, and I'm shame-filled, and at the same
time that thing (demon) is crying out, "She's mine. She's mine." It's
a horrible feeling. I was badly defeated by Satan because he got me out of
sacramental confession at the age of 13. What shrewdness of the devil. I used
to say, "I am not going to confession with a priest. Those priests are
worse sinners than I am, those homosexuals. No way am I going to confession to
them."
When going over that part of my life, the Lord
would say to me, "Who did you think you were and how dare did you take on
God's role and characterize MY anointed ones in such a manner." The Lord
would tell me, "They are flesh and bone, but the holiness of a priest is
my concern. ***The community where I have placed him as a gift."
The Lord showed me, how a community can be capable
of killing its own children by sacrificing them to the devil through abortion.
That's the worst of all sins, to kill your own children, to kill a baby. But
each time that there is an abortion, Satan releases from the pit of hell --
what is an abortion? Abortion is the same as killing an innocent baby, precious
innocent blood is shed because that baby is sinless. That baby is like a lamb
without blemish. Who is the only lamb without blemish? Jesus is. At that
moment, the baby is an image of Jesus Christ. The act of aborting a baby brings
such power to darkness, the fact that the mother herself kills her child. I am
only talking about provoked abortions, not spontaneous abortions. All those
demons come here to destroy humanity.
Who do you think those demons hate? They hate our
Church. Why do they hate our Church? Because our Lord lives there in the
tabernacle and our Church has the hands of a priest --- just imagine the hands
of a human being, of man, but a man anointed by God, a man who is recognized by
our Heavenly Father through the mark that he's placed in that (spiritual) wound
that all priests get in their heart. Through them a piece of bread becomes the
body, blood, soul and divinity of our Lord; in other words, the miracle of
transubstantiation occurs. Satan hates the hands of a priest, horribly. I was
very impressed when I watched the movie "The Passion of Christ."
Remember when they were scourging our Lord? Remember that Satan pulls out a
baby from over here and that baby looks at our Lord and laughs at him? That
thing is what I want to tell you about. Nowadays that thing is no longer a baby
it's a gigantic and perverse child. It has many, many people in slavery through
human pleasures, witchcraft, and mixed theology; for example, the belief that
Satan does not exist. Imagine the shrewdness of Satan to be able to convince
humanity that he is not real. He manipulates the destruction of men. He walks
men through the path of destruction.
And those of us who believe in God, we begin to
get confused. Satan begins to confuse the world. For example, some people go to
mass and after mass they go consult soothsayers and witch doctors and don't you
worry about it because you just went to mass and therefore you are on your way
to heaven. If God doesn't take care of your problems, Satan will. But don't you
worry about it because you're on your way to heaven. That's the confusion that
Satan bestows upon people. That thing manipulates all of that confusion.
When one goes to confession, one must ask the Holy
Spirit to enlighten, with His Holy light, the darkness of our minds. One of the
things that the devil does is to put darkness in our minds so that nothing is a
sin any longer. Anything goes. You do as you please and don't you worry
everything is fine, nothing is sin. When a soul goes to adoration holding hands
with the Blessed Virgin Mary and the Holy Spirit, our Lord imprints where our
parents and our teachers have imprinted and we must be docile so that He can
start to repair our sin, because He is the one who helps us repair all the evil
that we have done.
When I was before the Lord, the Lord showed me how
the deterioration of my soul was so terrible that I ended up becoming an
atheist. I didn't believe in God. I didn't believe in Satan. I didn't believe
in anything. How can it be possible that as a little girl I walked hand in hand
with God and now ended up eternally damned (eternal death), the death of my
soul. Our Lord said to me, "Whosoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood
unworthily, eats and drinks his/her own condemnation." And I ate and I
drank my condemnation.
The Lord showed me Satan in the Book of Life. He
showed me how Satan was so desperate to get me because I was 12 years old (at
that scene of my life that the Lord was going over with me) and I still
believed in God and I used to go to adoration with my mother. Satan was so
desperate to get me because our Lord would come up to me and He would cuddle up
with me right here. When I started living my sinful life, our Lord didn't allow
me to feel His peace any longer. I felt as though I was losing His peace in my
heart. And a mental battle began to happen in my mind. I would dwell over
whether I should follow what my friends were pressuring me to do or follow what
God was calling me to do. I would go to confession and my friends would say to
me, "Why do you go to confession? You are so outdated. Why do you go to
confession to those priests?"
At that moment, a mental battle began for me
between what my friends would tell me to do or not to do and what God and my
mother would tell me to do or not to do. Little by little, the scale began to
weigh down in the direction of what my friends were pressuring me to do. One of
the worst things that happened to me is going with my friend Stella and having
the *tarot cards read, in other words, having gone to a witch doctor. There I
was marked by the Beast. A plug was placed on me, right here (spiritually).
When you go to a witch doctor, to a soothsayer, to an astrologer, or when you
practice Santeria, or when you consult a medium, the Beast puts a plug on you
and your will is taken. When that plug or seal was put on me, the saddest thing
that happened to me was that I began having mental anguish; I began having
nightmares, anxieties, and a tremendous desire to commit suicide. I didn't
understand why. Well, now I know, I was marked or sealed with that thing. I
began to fall farther and farther away from a life of prayer. Whenever I would
pray, I wouldn't feel the presence of the Lord any longer, like I used to when
I was a child. I used pray in the following way, "Our Father who art in
heaven," but each day that went by, I found it more and more difficult to
pray. It's obvious why I was feeling that way. By getting involved in one form
of witchcraft or another, I opened up doors to the Beast.
When my friend Stella said to me, "You are
already 13 years old and you haven't been inaugurated." And I didn't know
what she was talking about. My mother used to always say to me -- she would
talk to me about the importance of virginity and how our virginity is our wedding
ring with our Lord. My friend Stella said to me, "As soon as my body began
to develop, my mother took me to see a gynecologist and I'm on the pill."
At that time, I didn't even know what "the pill" was. She explained
to me that they were contraceptive pills to prevent pregnancy. And she said to
me, "I already slept with my cousin, and with my friend, and a whole bunch
of other guys." She had a list of guys.
At that instant, a whole new world was revealed to
me, a world that was completely unknown to me.
My friends asked me, "You really do not know
anything about the birds and the bees?" I answered, "No."
My friends said to me, "We are taking you to
a place where we have all learned."
And I thought to myself, "Where are they
taking me?" I got scared. They took me to Downtown to this run down
theater. The first time I went to that, imagine how scared I was. We didn't
even own a TV in my house and now I found myself before this huge screen
watching such a movie. I almost died of fear. I was so scared. I felt as though
I was in hell and I wanted to run out of there but I wouldn't do it because I
was embarrassed to do so because all my friends were there.
A few days later, I went to church. I was
terrified of going to church. My heart was pounding. I went to confession.
Before, my confessions used to consist of sins such as: I didn't do my
homework, I was lazy, etc., that used to be the extent of my sins. This time I
said, "Father, excuse me, because I went to the movies." My mother
was next door before the Blessed Sacrament adoring our Lord. The priest goes,
"What did you do? You did what?" Once I finished I felt relief. I
thought, thank God my mom wasn't nearby because if she would have heard my
confession, I would have been dead meat. I was a little upset with the priest
because he was shocked at the fact that I went to the movies. I thought to
myself, what if I would have told him what kind of movie I went to go see. He
would have hit me. That's how the tricks of Satan began working in me. I began
to withhold sins every time I went to confession. I used to say, "This sin
I well confess to the priest, this sin I will withhold, this one I will
confess, this one I won't." Due to my consciously incomplete confessions,
I began to commit sacrilege every time I would receive the Eucharist. (In other
words, I began to receive the body and blood of our Lord unworthily because
with premeditation, knowingly, I would go receive our Lord.)
The sad thing is that I began to think, "Why
should I go to confession to these men, who get upset because I go to the
movies. I rather confess myself." And that's where my blasphemous
confessions began. And I, knowing that what I was doing was wrong, would still
receive the Eucharist. I was 13 years old and I, Gloria Polo, was a walking
skeleton. But you want to know what happened next? Something happened that
changed our little click. Let me tell you, for me it was an honor to hang out
with the most popular girls. When I was up there before the Lord, he showed me
how at age 13, our little click killed a classmate. How did we kill her? I used
to be made fun of by them. But when I became their friend, they stopped making
fun of me and they continued making fun of a young girl that they always made
fun of. She was a heavyset girl, obese. Since I had to look good in front of my
friends, I too began calling her names. I would say, "Here comes the pig.
Here comes the elephant." My friends and I would start walking the way she
walked and just making fun of her. The Lord showed me in the Book of Life how
every time we made fun of that girl, how she would become more self-conscious
and her self-esteem would diminish due to her being heavy. And each day that
went by, she felt uglier and uglier. The Lord showed me how that girl would
look at herself in the mirror and she would tighten plastic around her waist
and her body to try to hide her fat and to try to make herself look thinner.
She began to hate us. Hatred is death. God is love.
She began to hate herself because she looked
heavy. The more she looked at herself, the more she hated herself. Out of
desperation because of being so heavy, she drank a bottle of medication to lose
weight. And because of that, she never returned to school. And my friends and I
never knew why she didn't come back to school and we didn't care why either.
That young girl almost lost her sight due to the intoxication that she suffered
from that medication that she had drunk to try to lose weight. She received
that from humanity. That's why the sins of community/corporate are very grave,
brothers and sisters. Those are our sins that affect others, not just
individual sin, but all of our sins as a whole affect each other. And we do
nothing to change all that. That reflects the power of our words (to damage or
to bless others). When we destroyed that young girl by calling her names then
-- this is how Satan repays those who serve him. It's a domino effect. This
young girl destroys herself, then she destroys others, then others destroy
others, and there goes the chain. 20 years later something happened. I had an
older niece. To me that girl was everything. I used to say, what a beautiful
body she has, what appearance, what a beautiful young girl. She had beautiful
breasts, a beautiful firm behind, very sexy. You want to know what happened to
her? She was going to die. My niece almost died. She was almost completely
burned. More than 70% of her body suffered burns. The only thing that didn't
catch fire was her neck and her face. She was very sick. I went to chapel angry
at God. And I said to Him, "God, if you are real, show it to me. Show me
that you are real." That shows you how full of pride I was. My niece
lived. But she was completely burned. Her little hands were like this. During
the time when I was well off financially, I used to take her with me and my
family on vacation. I used to tell her, "Come get in the pool with
us." People would say, "How disgusting. How can they bring that trash
out here to ruin our vacation." That shows the perversion of a humanity,
who does not care about the suffering of others. My niece began to fear people.
She began to hate people because people would hurt her. That is what God is
going to show you when you go before Him. When you make fun of someone, what
authority do you have to do that? When you call someone names, what makes you
be so cruel without knowing what that person is feeling? God will show you that
when you go over there before Him. He is going to show you how many people you
have killed simply with a word. He is going to show you the power that exists
in the spoken word to kill souls, souls. But you know what? By going to
adoration and asking God for the grace to repair my sins, God began healing my
niece's soul because He is a Loving God in love with us. As we begin to close the
doors of evil, he begins to open the doors of blessing. That is the way in
which my friends and I, at the age of 13, killed a young girl in school. We
destroyed her soul
Our miseries didn't end there. You know what? When
one is 13 years old, we think that we own the world. When one is 13 years old,
we think that we can step on anyone we want. When we are 13 years old, we
believe that anyone who talks to us about God is a crazy person and that we
have the right to be happy. At exactly age 13, my friend Stella became
pregnant.
When she told me that she had missed her period, I
said to her very frightened, "Didn't you take the pill?"
She responded, "Yes, but it didn't
work."
I asked her, "What now? Who's the
father?"
She responded, "I don't know if it's my
boyfriend's or if I became pregnant when I went on vacation. I am going to have
to tell everyone that it's my boyfriend's baby."
When summer vacation started, she was already
showing a lot. She was almost five months pregnant. And supposedly her mother
was taking her on vacation. When she returned from her "vacation,"
she returned without a stomach. When I saw that her stomach was gone, was back
to normal, I asked her, "What happened to you?" When she came back
from her so-called vacation, she returned without her pregnant stomach, but she
was a living cadaver. She wasn't the life of the party anymore. She didn't pull
the crazy things that she used to pull on us. Like for example, we didn't like
going to mass. When the priest was an elderly priest, we used to complain that
mass was too long. We used to just play around during mass. But when we got a
young priest, there we were at mass. He was a gorgeous, young priest. We were
in love with that priest, "What a fine priest," we used to say. We
used to also say, "What a waste. Why did he have to become a priest. Let's
see how we can conquer him." That was our plan. The nuns used to be the
first ones to go up for communion. Then, it was our turn to go up for
communion. We would go up for communion without having been to confession. We
had a bet going. It was such a satanic thing and to us it was just a game. When
we would go up for communion, we would unbutton our blouses and we used to say,
"Whichever one of us makes the hand of the priest shake the most, while
receiving communion, that is the one who has the best breasts."
But when my friend Stella returned from her
vacation, all of those games ended. She was no longer the life of the party.
She looked as though she were dead. Her eyes reflected such sadness in her. She
didn't want to tell me what had happened to her. She took me to her house and
she pulled down her skirt and she showed me a scar that she had in the shape of
a U. Back then, that's how abortions were performed.
She said to me, "My mother became very, very,
very angry when I told her I was pregnant. She grabbed me by the hand; she
threw me in the car; and she took me to go see the gynecologist. My mother said
to the doctor, 'Charge me whatever, but take care of this problem immediately.'"
My friend Stella opened up her closet and on the shelf was a bottle this big
with a red cap on it, I'll never forget it! In it was a liquid and a
well-formed baby. On top of the red cap was a bottle of contraceptive pills.
Sin destroys mentally and emotionally. And in this case leads a mother to take
her daughter to get an abortion. And on top of that, she brings her dead baby
home and puts the contraceptives on top of it lest she forget to take the pill
ever again.
I asked my friend, "Didn't it hurt you?"
She said to me, "No. It doesn't hurt."
She was very resentful. "Aren't you sad?" "Why should I be sad?
On the contrary, what relief." But she was lying to me because she was
never the same Stella from before again. She became extremely depressed. She
began taking LSD. She began to become very resentful. She would laugh and crack
jokes, but, no, she was not the same. When my friend Stella began taking LSD
and other drugs, I was the first one that she offered it to, her best friend.
When she tried to give me marijuana, I became very frightened. I wanted to try
it because she used to tell me that it was a great feeling, that it felt as
though you were walking on the clouds in heaven, and that you would see
flowers. She would tell me about all the nice things that she used to see when
she consumed drugs. And I wanted to experience all that. When I was going to
try drugs for the first time, I wasn't able to. I said to her, "I can't.
If I go home smelling like you smell, my mom will kill me. My mother has a
great sense of smell. If she finds out, she'll kill me with the egg
beater."
Our Lord showed me, when I was over there before
him, that it wasn't the egg beater that I was afraid of. It was His grace upon
me that I received through my mother's prayers. And even though I was headed
for hell, she, with her prayers, with her rosary, I was being sustained from
going all the way deep into sin. When my friend gave me the LSD, I was only
able to bring it up to here and I couldn't do it. I couldn't. I couldn't. My
friends got very angry at me. They scolded me. But imagine if I would have
gotten home all high, my mother would have killed me. But that was one of the
many graces that I received from a mother full of God, a mother who was always
before the Blessed Sacrament praying.
And I turned 14, and I turned 15. Sadly, at age
16, after having my first boyfriend, my friends began to pressure me
psychologically by saying, "You're getting old. You're running out of
time. How can you be the black stain of the click." Imagine that, how can
a virtue (virginity) be a black stain. So the psychological pressure began. I
had promised them that as soon as I had my first boyfriend that I would please
them. When the time came, I was very scared. I used tell my friend Stella,
"What if I end up pregnant like you." Because remember she had her
dead baby in that jar in her closet.
She said to me, "That will not happen to you
because nowadays they have a new thing that works really well. It's called
*Norfos. It's a liquid to kill the sperms. There is also a new thing called
condoms. When I became pregnant, I was only on the pill. Look, don't worry
about it. You simply take five contraceptive pills that I am going to give you.
You must take them all at once. Also use the *Norfos and use two condoms and I
guarantee you that you will not get pregnant."
You have no idea of how much pain I felt within me
at having to go please my friends. When I lost my virginity, you cannot imagine
the sadness I felt. My mother was totally right. A young girl, who loses her
purity, also loses her brightness. I felt as though I'd lost something that I
was never again going to get back. I felt a lot of pain and a lot of sadness
like you have no idea. I don't know where people get the idea from that sex
between young people is so delicious. I felt destroyed. I felt very sad. I was
afraid to set foot in my house. I never looked my mother in the eye again
because I was afraid that she would find out by looking into my eyes that I was
no longer pure. After doing that, I was so angry at myself. I was so angry at
my friends, because I had done this just to please them, that I began to hate
my friends. But you know what? In spite of using two condoms and everything
else, I still ended up pregnant in my first sexual relation.
Imagine the fear of a young-sixteen-year-old girl
finding out that she was pregnant. I began to notice a lot of changes in my
body. In the midst of all that fear, I began to feel love for the child that I
was carrying in my womb. I approached my boyfriend and I told him I was
pregnant. He said, "What? This is your first time and you got
pregnant?" I said, "Yes. There is nothing else that we can do now. I
am pregnant." I wanted my boyfriend to ask me to get married. He said to
me, "I am only 17 � years old; you are 16. We are not going to waste our
lives. You must have an abortion." I went to where my friend Stella had
gone. She tried to encourage me by saying, "It didn't work but nothing is
going to happen. Remember, I've had a few abortions now. The first time I was a
little sad. But the second time I didn't feel anything. And by the third
abortion, you don't feel anything anymore."
I said to her, "If my mother ever sees that
huge scar from the surgery, she'll kill me."
She responded by saying, "No. They don't do
it like that anymore. Mine was a big scar because the baby was already big.
Yours is still small."
How painful. How painful. The beast tells us that
we have to be normal, that we must enjoy sex because Satan, the beast, feeds off
of human sacrifice. The beast becomes more powerful after each human sacrifice.
I was very scared when I arrived at the hospital where I had the abortion done.
It was a hospital very, very far away from home. The doctor put me to sleep.
After I came to, I was never the same person anymore. They killed my baby, but
I died with him. You want to know what the Lord showed in the Book of Life? In
the Book of Life, the Lord showed me, and He will show you too when you go
before him, what you can't see in your human nature with human eyes, that is,
the spiritual things that are really happening. The Lord showed me how the
doctor grabbed my baby with tongs and began cutting him up in pieces. The Lord
showed me how the baby would scream. Even if a baby has only been conceived a
second ago or 15 seconds ago and you are trying to kill him with the Day After
pill, the baby screams so hard, so hard, that the heavens tremble because that
baby already has a soul, a mature soul, in the image of God. And that baby is
submerged in the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit comes out of the heart of God. My
baby screamed so loud that our Lord, on the cross, screamed so hard, so hard,
so hard. Every time somebody commits an abortion, our Lord screams so hard with
so much pain like you have no idea.
Now, let me ask you, how many crimes occur on a
daily basis? God loves us so much that He remains on the cross begging us. The
worst of all the sins I committed was the sin of abortion. And I used to say
that I had never killed anyone. When I killed my baby through abortion, our
Lord showed me how there was a huge, gigantic, stadium filled with demons.
There were so many demons. It looked as though the demons were attending a
World Cup game but with many, many, many more demons in attendance enjoying the
human sacrifice, that happens every time there is an abortion. They enjoy that
so much. Imagine, how can it be that a mother to whom God has given the gift of
giving life chooses to kill her own baby, a mother who against wind and fire
protects her own child and that same mother kills her baby through abortion. I
feel a lot of pain when, in my country, I see commercials on TV that tell us to
enjoy safe sex by using a condom. Well, with two condoms and everything else, I
ended up pregnant. Through the waves of communication and all of his
strategies, the devil has led humanity to kill their own children. Why do you
think that is? That is because that is the worst sin of all. When we kill a
baby, what are we doing in reality? Are we offering that baby up to God? God is
love.
Every time, there is an abortion, the blood shed
by that baby is like a key that Satan turns and the Lord showed me something
that looked like seals on the ground and every time there is an abortion, those
seals open up and millions of spirits get released on to earth from the pit of
hell, spirits such us: the spirit of homosexuality, the spirit of lust, the
spirit of satanic worship, the spirit of atheism, spirits of suicide, of
abortion, spirits of everything that we are seeing nowadays. Haven't you
noticed how human beings are becoming less and less Christian?
When I killed my baby, I was completely torn
apart. I became an alcoholic. I used drink heavily because when I would drink,
I would get happy. You have no idea of the scars that abortion leaves in a
woman. But to top it off, the gynecologist who performed the abortion on me
says to me, "Look, I have a great method of contraception. It's called
IUD." He pretty much took me out of a conscious abortion to an unconscious
one. You know what? I had an IUD in me from the age of 16 up until I was struck
by lightening. I would only remove it, after I got married, when I wanted to
get pregnant. Those of you who have used the IUD as a method of contraception
will understand what I am about to say. I know that many times during your
period, you bleed heavily, like a hemorrhage, and you begin to cramp, and you
simply go to the gynecologist. The gynecologist tells you, "That's normal.
That happens because it's an object foreign to your body and the IUD moved a
little and that's why you are hemorrhaging. Let me just give you a shot and
you'll be fine." Those are micro-abortions.
I had no excuse to say that the IUD was a form of
abortion because in spite of all my sins, I used to go to mass on Sunday. Mass
used to be the most boring thing in the world for me. I used to complain if the
priest went on too long. The priest would be giving his homily and I would
never pay attention. During mass, there are demons in there that begin to
massage your head like this to make you sleepy. I was at Mass one time and my
guardian angel removed some like plugs from my ears. At that moment, the priest
was talking about the IUD. When I hear him say "IUD," that caught my
attention. I said, "Let me listen to what this dummy is saying about the
IUD." The priest was saying something like this, "The IUD and the
internal contraceptives are a form of abortion. As a consequence, any women who
use the IUD are committing abortion. The Church defends life; therefore, whoever
uses those forms contraceptives is committing abortions and is excommunicated
from the Church." I became furious. I said, "What? Excommunicated?
Who does this priest think he is to say that. That is why this Church does not
make any progress and it's in the hole because it doesn't go along with
science. Who do they think they are. Is this priest willing to feed all of the
children that we might otherwise end up with?" I was furious. I had no
excuse. I couldn't say that I didn't know that what I was doing was wrong. But
I continued using the IUD. How many babies did I kill? Who knows. That is why I
was always very depressed and very sad because this womb, instead of being a
fountain of life, had become a cemetery.
Going back to the Commandments. First Commandment.
Love the Lord thy God above all else. My God was when I would go to church and
would ask him, "God, please, I need money for my rent. I have no money. I
am going to have liens placed against me." That was the extent of my
relationship with God, a purely economical relationship. I wanted God to love
me and to give me everything I wanted, but I didn't want him to tell me that
the lifestyle that I was living was a sinful one. The Devil anesthetized my
conscious. The following would hurt our Lord very much. On Sundays after mass,
I would go up to the statue of Baby Jesus and I would put my hand on His
stretched out hand and say, "Send some money my way because I am in great
financial need." Imagine that, my commercial relationship with God.
The more I would ask Him for money, the quicker I
bankrupted. Then, a lady said to me, "Look, I was in a terrible financial
situation, and I went to a pastor and he prayed over me and my situation
changed."
I said to her, "Tell me who this pastor is
because I want to go there."
I began to negotiate with my faith. Imagine the
infidelity. Go here, go there, to whomever offers you a better offer. I went to
the pastor. He imposed his hands on me. I supposedly received Christ. And I
began liking it a lot because I used like high-impact aerobics, and over there
everyone used to jump up and down. I began to criticize our priest. I would
say, "The priests are boring. Mass is boring." They would say to me,
"Over there, they are idolaters." I wouldn't kneel before the crucifix
any longer. Then confusion began to enter my mind. There used to live a little
old lady in front of my house. She had no money. She was very poor. I used to
give her money for her light bill, water bill, and little things like that. I
would by groceries for her. She loved me very much. But the thing is that when
we don't have God in our hearts even the good works get stained by our sins.
When I started going to this protestant church, I began to sow confusion into
the elderly lady's mind. She was Catholic. The grave thing is that sin doesn't
just stay with the sinner. Sin gets spread to the person next to us. In a
nutshell, the little old lady did not receive the Anointing of the Sick before
dying. Imagine what I did. When the pastor asked me for 10%, I became furious.
Here I was without any money and he was asking me for 10% of what little I had.
My protestant high ended right there.
Later, someone told me that there was a person who
read the cards according to astrology. And that I would be guided by the
heavenly bodies. There I go running to this place. I went there one time. One
day after Mass, I went running over there. It was very expensive. I borrowed
money to go there. Imagine the irony, I had no money and yet I borrowed money
to go to this place. Once one begins to attend any form of witchcraft, one
begins to feel very lazy to pray, one begins to feel insecure, one begins to
feel suicidal and depressed. You have no idea how terrible it is to open those
doors. And those doors bring curses into your life.
Towards the end of my life, I ended up not being
able to sleep. Between the anguish due to the bankruptcy, and all the debt
staring me in the face, I couldn't have a good night's sleep. Then another lady
tells me, "Look, doctor. I see very bad energy around you. Somebody has
placed a curse on you. You need a cleansing session." She comes to my
office and she does the cleansing session. After that cleansing session, demons
would go in and out of my office, laughing. I ended up losing my faith. I was
in a terrible spiritual crisis. I went to go talk to a priest.
I said to this priest, "Father, if I were to
die right now, I'd go straight to hell."
The priest laughed and said to me, "What
hell? Hell does not exist." When I heard him say that, my faith collapsed.
And I thought to myself, "If hell does not exist, neither does God. If God
does not exist, the only thing that exists is man and his reason,
intelligence." At that point in my life, I was going for my Master's and I
was always around atheists. At that point, I decided to become an atheist
myself. When I was struck by lightening, I didn't believe in God and I didn't
believe in hell.
Our Lord showed me the power of the spoken word.
Why has God given us the power of the spoken word? He has given us the power of
the spoken word to pray, to reprimand evil spirits, to heal, to perform
deliverances in His name and to bless others in His name. The spoken word has
so much power. When you say to someone, "God bless you," that
blessing goes to a bank that the Catholic Church has in heaven. There may be a
person in his/her deathbed and that person may very well be the worst sinner of
all, and one may think that there is no salvation for that person, well, that
"God bless you," that someone once said to that person at one time or
another, gets withdrawn from the bank in heaven at that very moment when he
needs it the most; that is, when he or she is in his or her deathbed. And our
Lord allows that blessing to come down with all His love, and the love of the Blessed
Virgin Mary, and the love of all the Saints. He allows that blessing to come
down when a person needs it the most. A person needs that blessing the most at
their time of death. Due to that blessing, the person in his/her deathbed can
repent at the last minute and go to the very bottom of purgatory.
We tend to say, I pray and I bless and nothing
happens. No, that's not true. God knows how he's going to use and apply that
prayer or that blessing. The thing is that every thing happens in Divine Order
and Divine Time. God knows when.
But just like it, there is power in cursing
others. When a Christian curses -- I used to always curse. I used to always
say, "This damned life of mine. This damned this. This damned that."
Everything was damned. When I was over there, our Lord showed my how all that
cursing dries up lakes of water ****50
That brings us to the Second Commandment. We were talking
about how God has given to us the power of the spoken word to extend the
Third Commandment; to observe holy days of
obligation. What pain, brothers and sisters, it is to see a meek God, so in
love with us, a God that remains there in the Eucharist for us, waiting with an
open heart for someone to go adore Him. It's so beautiful to be able to see, in
the spirit, how our Church is inundated by the Blessed Virgin Mary, the angels,
the saints. The Holy Spirit pours himself out. I was shown how at every church,
the roof disappears and immediately an angel appears and pours out a chalice
and many, many, many of what appeared to be purple lights. That's the
anointing, the anointing to lead us to adoration of the Blessed Sacrament.
The sad part is that all of that anointing would
end up on the floor because my heart was not there to thank Him, to praise Him,
to adore Him. He knocks and knocks and knocks (at the door of the heart.)
Brothers and sisters, let me say something to you, don't let this be a passing
feeling or the emotion of attending a retreat. Take it with you for the rest of
your life. I pray that some day God will show you what goes on in the Spirit. I
hope he allows you to see how the Saints approach us regularly and they offer
us like gold pebbles. Those gold coins are graces, graces that they pour into
our hearts. For example,
We tend to think that the joy of the Lord means
not having any problems, not having any difficulties, not to have any
suffering. Whoever told you that that is true? In Christ, suffering loses
importance; problems lose the importance that we give them. There is no greater
treasure than to discover and enjoy the Eucharistic love that we receive into
our hearts from God. Let's not miss out on the opportunity to be Catholic our
whole lives. Trust Him. Trust Him. We cannot become saints on our own, but He
can make us saints. Let's give up our freedom and free will to Him. He knows
what we need. He loves it when we turn our burdens over to him. And we must
trust in Him. And the more mishaps that happen to us, the more we need to trust
in Him. That's the invitation that we have as Catholics, to be contemplative,
to adore the Blessed Sacrament. Once you put it into practice, you'll see how
many blessings will be poured upon your respective families.
Next commandment; to honor your father and mother.
I've already told you the type of daughter I was. I was very disrespectful. I
used to say that my mother was the mother of Fred Flintstone, that she was old
fashioned. You have no idea of the amount of blessings that get poured down
from heaven to a dark-looking earth simply because of mothers who go before the
Blessed Sacrament to spend time with him in adoration, and to entrust their
burdens to Him, and to Trust in Him. When I went before the Lord, the Lord
would say to me, "No one has loved you, nor will anyone ever love you, on
earth, the way your mother loves you, never."
Fifth Commandment: Thou shall not kill. I already
shared with you about the worst of crimes. Before the eyes of God, there is no
sadder crime that I committed -- don't get me wrong they were all bad -- than
the sin of abortion. Many people have asked me how they can make reparation for
the sin of abortion. Can I return my baby's life back? Of, course not. It's a
deep wound. But one of the big blessings that Holy Mother the Church has given
us is that what priests untie here on earth, also gets untied in heaven. Glory
to God for that. Imagine, how terrible the worst of all crimes, when we kill
our own children. Blessed be the Lord that He forgives us. But what did he say
to the adulterous woman who was about to be stoned to death? He said to her,
"Go and sin no more." What the priest did here today was a great act
of reparation. The Baptism of babies, intentional Baptism -- what wisdom the Catholic
Church has -- intentional Baptism allows those babies to come out of limbo and
become angels who in turn are praying for our salvation. That is the beauty of
the divine economy of God.
When a man or woman evangelizes on the subject of
abortion and a baby is saved, that's reparation. I'll finish by saying this, I
used to get together with my girlfriends to shred to pieces and to talk bad
about our husbands and men in general. I had a friend, who was also an
orthodontist. She used to always be attentive to her husband. She used to say,
"I can't stay because my love is going to be coming home soon and I want
to be home for him." She was a very good wife and a very devout Catholic.
I used to tell her, "Why do you kiss up to
him. He's going to cheat on you some day. And when he does, you'll see how
you'll be crying on this shoulder. Because men are dogs and they are
unfaithful." Later on as time went by, my friend was crying on this
shoulder, right here. She had found her husband making out with his secretary
in the office. My friend was completely distraught.
When she walks in crying, I said to her, "You
see, I told you. And you wouldn't go out with us anywhere to be attentive to
him." The Lord showed me how myself and my other friends surrounded her
like animals. We accomplished what we set out to accomplish; first, see to it
that she wouldn't forgive her husband. Her husband begged her for forgiveness.
I would say to her, "No way. Do not forgive him. Let the poor wives who
can't afford to leave their husbands put up with it. But you have money to
support yourself. Don't take him back. You're young and beautiful. You
shouldn't forgive him." When one speaks, it's very obvious who dwells
within us. We accomplished our first victory. My friend did not forgive her
husband.
The Lord showed me how deep down inside, my friend
wanted to forgive her husband. Secondly, bad friendships, bad influences, can
cause a lot of damage. I thought I was a good friend because I would hear her
out and would speak words of "consolation" to her. But in reality I
was destroying her. We accomplished our mission. She divorced her husband. And
two years later when she remarried, civilly, she threw a big party. She married
an Argentinean man. We killed her! We lead her to go from a Sacramental marriage
to a pagan marriage, a man-made marriage. You know what? Our Lord gets very
hurt when a woman, or a man, does not fight for his or her marriage, when they
do not try to keep their home together, when they do not try to give love to
their children, for children to have their original (biological) father and
mother.
To wrap this up, a few years ago, I was at a
retreat. The priest there allowed me to give my testimony. For some reason I
forgot to talk about my friend leaving her husband and marrying the Argentinean
man. A young 14-year-old girl came up to me crying and said to me, "You
know what, Gloria? My mom married a man from
We are going to answer to God for what we may
think is the most insignificant piece of advice that we may give someone if it
destroys a marriage. And we think we haven't killed!
Seventh Commandment: Thou shall not steal. And I
used to say that I had never stolen. I robbed God. How? By not helping
construct a better world, by not extending the
The Lord pointed out to me, how we make so many
errors when judging others. For example, our Lord sees a prostitute with eyes
of mercy. On the contrary, we tend to call them bad names. Our Lord sees their
whole life and the circumstances that lead them up to become prostitutes. A lot
of them are the result of our own sins; that is, sins of community (rather than
individual sins). Instead of judging others, if you see someone's faults, pray
for them. Do not give false testimony and do not lie. There is no such thing as
white lies, or pink lies, or green lies. A lie is a lie and Satan is the father
of lies.
I used to lie so much and what for? My life was
brought out to the open. And you'll see, yours will too. All falsehood, all
lies come to an end before Him. But no one is going to point the finger at you
when you are before the Lord. If my mom would have found out everything I was
doing while she was still alive, she would have killed me. But over there, she
would just look at me with eyes of mercy. A lie is a lie. We become so good at
lying, that we end up believing our own lies. The worst of lies that I used to
say is, "I do not kill. I do not steal. God is not real. But if God
happened to be real, I know I'll be headed to heaven because I am such a good person."
Ninth Commandment: Do not entertain impure
thoughts. Do not covet thy neighbor's wife/husband. The only other person that
is more jealous than your husband or your wife is God. I was unfaithful to my
husband and I never even kissed another man. How was I unfaithful then? I was
unfaithful by the way I used to dress. I used wear low-cut blouses all the
time. The instincts and thoughts of a man would be stimulated by the way I used
to dress. I wasn't all that, but the devil gets in there and takes advantage of
the situation. And the Lord pointed out to me, "It's better to tear out
your eye."
Tenth Commandment: Do not covet your neighbor's
goods. As I have previously told you, money was my god. I thought that being
happy meant having a lot of money. Since I had practically nothing growing up,
I wanted my children to have it all. I used to think that happiness was found
in having material things. At that point in my life is when I let go of God's
hands. You want to know how the Book of Life, of my life, concluded? It
concluded in the following way: Before I was taken to the Social Security
Hospital, they took me to a public hospital (like a county hospital). At the
Social Security Hospital, there were so many sick people, so many wounded
people that there wasn't a bed/gurney for me to be placed on. God permitted the
total abandonment of men.
Upon arrival there, the paramedics would ask the
doctors, "Where do we place her?"
The doctors would simply respond,
"Anywhere."
"Anywhere, where?"
"Well, just put a sheet on the floor and
place her on the sheet."
"No. We are not leaving her on the
floor." The paramedics knew that I was badly burned and that if they would
simply place me on the floor that I would be prone to catching an infection.
The poor doctors would simply look at me and they would see that I was the
least likely to live, so instead they would be taking care of the patients that
had a better survival chance, such as patients who had suffered strokes or
heart attacks. I was so frustrated. I would just be complaining and complaining
while I was there. But there came a moment in which I wasn't complaining
anymore. All of a sudden, our Lord appeared to me. He was holding my head and
consoling me. In between the pain that I was feeling and everything else, I
thought I was hallucinating, those were my thoughts at that moment. I would
close my eyes and open them up again, and there He was.
He said to me, "Look, my little one, you are
going to die. I want you to feel in need of my mercy." Imagine that! When
He said that to me, I closed my eyes and I said, "Mercy? Why mercy? I
haven't done anything wrong." I just kept thinking over and over again,
"But I haven't done anything bad." My conscious had been anesthetized
(by the devil). One thing was clear in my mind, though, that I was going to
die. I said, "Oh, no, I am going to die, what about my diamond
rings."
At that moment I looked at my hands and saw that
the flesh from around my fingers looked as though it had exploded; my nails
were gone. At that moment I said to myself, "I have to take them off
because otherwise they'll have to cut them and they'll lose their value."
I saw how my fingers were swelling up. So I started trying to remove them.
There I was twisting them to try to take them off. As I was trying to take them
off, the smell that came from my burned flesh was awful. The more I twisted the
rings to try to remove them from my fingers, the more that the smell of burned
flesh would penetrate. Pieces of flesh would come off as I was trying to remove
those rings. It was so painful that I thought I was going to faint. I would say
to myself, "No. I have to take them off. In my life, I've always
accomplished what I've set out to do." When I finally got the rings off my
fingers, I said, "Oh, no. I am going to die and the nurses are going to
steal them."
And right before the Lord closed the Book of Life
on me, He showed me how my brother-in-law came to the hospital to where I was.
And I said, "Good. Now my rings are safe." I handed my rings over to
my brother-in-law. Good thing he's a doctor, if not, he probably would have
thrown them away because imagine they had chunks of flesh in them.
I said to my brother-in-law, "Give them to my
husband, Fernando. Tell my sisters to take care of my children because they are
not going to have a mother anymore. I am not going to survive this one."
It had been made very clear to me that I was going to die. When the Lord was
telling me to feel in need of His mercy, I was more worried about how holy I
was. Those who think that they are good and holy are the ones that end up in
hell. When I handed the rings over to my brother-in-law, I thought to myself,
"Now, I can die." My last thought before the Book of Life concluded,
and before my life ended, was, "What money are they going to bury me with?
I have nothing but debts." At that moment, my life ended and the Book of
Life was closed. I began asking all the saints to please save me. I even
surprised myself as to how many names of saints I could remember.
I began to call out, "St. Ambrose, St.
Ysidro, save me." I was such a terrible Catholic that I didn't understand
that salvation is a grace and it could only be accomplished through my Savior.
Once I couldn't think of anymore saints to call out on, and once I realized
that there was nothing anyone could do for me, I lifted my eyes up and my eyes
encountered my mother's eyes. When I saw my mother, I felt a lot of pain due to
the knowledge I had that she had always tried to guide me to God. I saw her and
I said to her, "Mom, what shame, I have been sentenced to hell."
At that moment, my mother was given a special
grace. She lifted up her two fingers and she pointed upward, as to tell me to
look up. I don't know what I saw. But immediately, upon my looking up, some
terrible scales were removed from my eyes, my spiritual blindness. At that
moment, I was shown something that had happened to me while I was alive. A
patient had come in to see me and she had said to me, "Look, Doctor, I
feel very sorry for you. You are a very materialistic person. Whenever you find
yourself in imminent danger, whatever it maybe, plead to Jesus to cover you
with His precious blood. He will never, never abandon you because He paid the
price for you with His blood."
In spite of all the pain that had taken over me at
that moment, I yelled out, "Jesus Christ, have mercy on me. Forgive me.
Give me a second chance."
That was the most beautiful moment. He came down
from the light; he pulled me out of that hole; he placed me on the flat surface.
And he said to me, "You are going to be allowed to go back. You are going
to get a second chance but not because of the prayers of your loved ones
because it's normal that your loved ones pray for you. Instead, you are getting
a second chance through the prayers of all those who do not know you and have
prayed for you."
You want to know what was shown to me, brothers
and sisters? I saw the great power of intercessory prayer! You want to know how
to be in the presence of God daily? Don't pray for your children; instead, pray
for the children of all the persons in the world. Don't pray for youselves;
pray for all those who are suffering the same trials that you are suffering. I
saw how millions and millions of flames were going up to heaven. I was shown
what those little flames represented. They represented the prayers said by all
the persons who were touched and moved by the news of my being struck by
lightening. The news came out on the newspaper and on TV. Many, many people
offered many different forms of prayer for me. The biggest gift that you can
offer a human being is the Eucharist because the Eucharist is not an endeavor
of man but rather of God!
You want to know why I am here today before you? I
am here today because there is a saint in my country. His flame was the biggest
of all flames, the biggest, the biggest of all. When our Lord was showing all
this to me, I was thinking to myself, "Who is this man who loves me so
much?" The Lord showed me who he was. He was a very, very poor farmer. He lives
at the foothill of
When he was in prayer, he would pray by saying,
"Lord, thank you for my life. Lord, I love you. I praise you. Thank you
for my children." The only thing that came out this man's mouth was praise
and worship. The Lord showed me how at one point, this farmer had two bills in
his pocket. He had a bill worth $10,000 pesos and a bill worth $5,000 pesos.
That's all he had. During the collection at mass, he put the $10,000 in the
basket.
When did I ever put paper money (a bill) in the
collection basket? I would only put bills in the collection basket when I'd get
a counterfeit one at the office. He gave $10,000 pesos in the offering. After
mass, after receiving the Eucharist, he went to the store. And with the $5,000
pesos, he purchased a piece of bread and salt. The clerk at the store wrapped
the piece of bread with a piece of newspaper from the previous day. The
newspaper is called the Expectator. There was a picture of me on that piece of
newspaper. When he got home and he was about to put that piece of bread away,
he looks at my picture that was on that piece of newspaper. He was very, very,
very touched by it. He could barely read. He began reading it with great
effort, "O-d-o-n-t-o-l-o-g-i-s-t." As he reads on, he cries, and
cries, and cries, as though I were his daughter. At that moment, he tells out
Lord, "Father, have mercy on my little sister. Lord, save her. Lord, if
you save my little sister, I promise you that I'll go to the sanctuary in Buga
and I will make a special promise there. But save my sister, Lord."
Can you imagine that! This poor man had no money
to eat, yet he made a promise to our Lord to go cross-country to fulfill this
promise for me. He was simply asking God. He was not complaining or demanding
anything of God. That moved God in a great manner. Thanks to him I am here
today, brothers and sisters. The Lord pointed him out to me and tells me,
"That is love of neighbor."
Right then and there, the Lord gave me my mission.
He gives me my mission and he says to me, "All this that has transpired,
you are not only going to repeat it a thousand times, but a thousand times a
thousand. And woe to those who hear your testimony and do not change because
they will be judged with greater severity, in the same manner that you are
going to be judged with greater severity. Be it (priests), my anointed ones, or
whoever because there is no greater deaf person than he/she who does not want
to hear, nor is there greater blind person than he/she who does not want to
see."
Brothers and sisters, this is not a threat. On the
contrary, this is a God who is so in love with us. He's letting you use this
mirror, this very mirror, because he does not want you over there in that hole
like I was. He wants you with him. But we must allow ourselves to be
transformed by God. May the Lord keep you and let's pray one for the other. God
bless you. This little girls is the miracle that God gave me, with burned
ovaries and all. Her name is Maria Jose. Say hello, daughter. God bless you.