Divine Mercy Diary - Notebook 3 (Page 1 of 1)
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Divine Mercy
In my soul

The Diary
of the Servant of God
Sister M. Faustina Kowalska

NOTEBOOK III

J.M.J.
Thank You, O Lord, my Master, That You have transformed me entirely into Yourself, And accompany me through life's toils and labors; I fear nothing when I have You in my heart.

J.M.J.
The Lord's Supper is laid, Jesus sits with His Apostles, His Being all transformed into love, For such was the Holy Trinity's counsel. With great desire, I desire to eat with You, Before I suffer death. About to leave You, love holds me in Your midst. He sheds Blood, gives His life, for He loves immensely. Love hides under the appearance of bread, Departing, He remains with us. Such self-abasement was not needed, Yet burning love hid Him under these species. Over the bread and wine He says these words: "This is My Blood, this is My Body." Although mysterious, these are the words of love. Then He passes the Cup among His disciples. Jesus grew deeply troubled within. And said, "One of you will betray his Master". They fell silent, with a silence as of the tomb, And John inclined his head on His breast.
The supper is ended. Let us go to Gethesame. Love is satisfied, And there the traitor is waiting.

J.M.J.
O Divine Will, You are my nourishment, You are my delight. Hasten, O Lord, the Feast of Mercy that souls may recognize the fountain of Your goodness.
God and souls. Sister M. Faustina of the Blessed Sacrament. Cracow, March 1, 1937.
O will of the Omnipotent God, You are my delight, You are my joy. Whatever the hand of my Lord holds out to me I will accept with gladness, submission and love. Your holy will is my repose; In it is contained all my sanctity, And all my eternal salvation, For doing God's will is the greatest glory. The will of God - those are His various wishes Which my soul carries out without reserve, Because such are His divine desires, in those moments when God shares His confidences with me. Do with me as You will, Lord. I place no obstacles, I make no reservations. For You are my whole delight and the love of my soul, And to You, in turn, I pour out the confidences of my heart.


J.M.J. Cracow, March 1, 1937. Third note book
Gods and Souls.

Let the glory and praise to The Divine Mercy rise from every creature throughout all ages and times.

O my Lord and God, You command me to write about the graces You grant me. O my Jesus, were it not for a clear command from my confessors, that I am to write down what goes on in my soul, I would not of my own choice write a single word. And so, if I do write about myself, it is at the command of holy obedience.

Praise and glory be to You, O Holy Trinity, Eternal God. May the mercy springing from Your very bowels protect us from Your just anger. Let the praise of Your incomprehensible mercy resound everywhere. All Your works bear the seal of Your unfathomable mercy, O God.

March 1, 1937. The Lord gave me to know how displeased He is with a talkative soul. "I find no rest in such a soul. The constant din tires Me, and in the midst of it the soul cannot discern My voice."

Today I asked the Lord Jesus to let me meet with a certain person, and this would be a sign for me that He is calling her to this convent ( which I am to found). And I did meet her and understood that this soul has a vocation, and I asked the Lord to deign to form her Himself. I have talked to her often about a vocation; the Lord will do the rest.

March 5, 1937. Today, I experienced the Passion of the Lord Jesus in my own body for a long while. The pain is very great, but all this is for the sake of immortal souls.

Today, the Lord visited me, pressed me to His Heart and said, "Rest, My little child. I am always with you."

March 8, 1937. Today, as I was praying for the intention of Father Andrasz, I suddenly understood how intimately this soul communed with God and how pleasing he was to the Lord. It gave me immense joy, because I desire intensely that all souls be united with God as closely as possible.

During prayer today, my soul was overcome with such a strong desire to begin the work, that I could not restrain my enthusiasm. Oh, how ardently I desire that the souls in this Congregation present themselves before the throne of God and continuously His incomprehensible mercy on behalf of the whole world, praising and glorifying this unfathomable mercy of God. A mysterious force is driving me to action.


March 12, 1937. I saw the weariness of a certain priest (probably Father Sopocko) for whom the Lord has traced out a hard and difficult roads; but the fruits of his work are alive. May God give us many such souls, capable of loving Him in the midst of the greatest torments.

I felt today how greatly a certain dying soul desired prayers. I prayed until I felt she had died. Oh dying souls are in such great need of prayer! O Jesus, inspire souls to pray often for the dying.

March 15, 1937. Today, I entered into the bitterness of the Passion of the Lord Jesus. I suffered in a purely spiritual way. I learned how horrible sin was. God gave me to know the whole hideousness of sin. I learned in the depths of my soul how horrible sin was, even the smallest sin, and how much it tormented the soul of Jesus. I would rather suffer a thousand hells than commit even the smallest venial sin.

The Lord said to me, "I want to give myself to souls and to fill them with My love, but few there are who want to accept all the graces My love has intended for them. My grace is not lost; if the soul for whom it was intended does not accept it, another soul takes it."

I frequently feel that certain persons are praying for me. I experience this suddenly in my soul, but I do not always know which person is interceding for me. I also know when someone has trouble because of something that has to do with me; of this too I am inwardly aware, even though the distance (that separates us) is very great.

March 18, 1937. I have come to know that I have received a certain grace that brings me into great intimacy and communion with the Lord. He gives me to know by this means of an interior light. He allows me to know His greatness and holiness and how graciously He lowers himself to me. He gives me an exclusive knowledge of His love for me, and of how He is Lord of absolutely all things, and also of how He gives himself to a soul while suspending all the laws of nature. He acts as He wills.

I understand the spiritual espousal of a soul with God, which has no exterior manifestation. It is a purely interior act between the soul and God. This grace has drawn me into the very burning center of God's love. I have come to understand His Trinitarian Quality and the absolute Oneness of His Being. This grace is different from all other graces. It is so extremely spiritual that my inaccurate description knows not how to express even a shade of it.

I have such a strong desire to hide myself that I would like to live as though I did not exist. I feel a strange inner urge to hide myself as deeply as possible so as to be known only to the Heart of Jesus to rest in. I shall admit nothing that might awaken my Beloved. My concealment gives me a chance to commune constantly and exclusively with my Bridegroom. I commune with creature in so far as it is pleasing to Him. My heart has come to love the Lord with the full force of love, and I know no other love, because it is from the beginning that my soul has sunk deeply in the Lord as in its only treasure.

Although outwardly I meet with many sufferings and various adversities, this does not, however, lessen my interior life for a moment nor disturb my inner silence. I do not fear at all being abandoned by creatures because, even if all abandoned me, I would not be alone, for the Lord is with me. And even if the Lord were to hide, love will know how to find Him. For love knows no gates or guards; even the keen-eyed Cherub himself, with his flaming sword, will not stop love; it will work its way through the wilderness and scorching heat, through storm, thunder and darkness, and will reach the source from which it came, and there it will endure forever. All things will come to an end; but love, never.


Today, I received some oranges. When the sister had left, I thought to myself, "Should I eat the oranges instead of doing penance and mortifying myself during Holy Lent? After all, I am feeling a bit better." Then I heard a voice in my soul: "My daughter, you please Me more by eating the oranges out of obedience and love of Me than by fasting and mortifying yourself of your own will. A soul that loves Me very much, ought to live by My will. I know your heart, and I know that it will not be satisfied by anything but My love alone."

I would not know how to live without the Lord. Jesus often visits me in this seclusion, teaches me, reassures me, rebukes me, and admonishes. He himself forms my heart according to His divine wishes and likings, but always with much goodness and mercy. Our hearts are fused as one.

March 19, 1937. Today, I united myself in spirit with the Adoration that is taking place in our house (40 - hour adoration in Cracow), but my soul was full of torments, and some strange kind of apprehension was piercing my heart. Because of this, I redoubled my prayers. Suddenly I saw the gaze of God reaching into the depths of my heart.

As I sat down to a very tasty breakfast, I said to the Lord, "Thank you for these gifts, but my heart is dying of longing for You, and nothing earthly is tasty to me. I desire the food of Your love".

Today I was drawn by some mysterious force to act. I must resist this attraction, or else I would follow it at once.

March 21, 1937. Palm Sunday. During Mass, my soul was steeped in the bitterness and suffering of Jesus. Jesus gave me to understand how much He had suffered in that triumphal procession. "Hosanna" was reverberating in Jesus' heart as an echo of "Crucify". Jesus allowed me to feel this in a special way.

The doctor did not allow me to go to the chapel to attend the Passion Service, although I had a great desire for it; however, I prayed in my own room. Suddenly I heard the bell in the next room, and I went in and rendered a service to a seriously sick person. When I returned to my room, I suddenly saw the Lord Jesus, who said, "My daughter, you gave me greater pleasure by rendering Me that service than if you had prayed for a long time." I answered, "But it was not to You, Jesus, but to that patient that I rendered this service." And the Lord answered me, "Yes, My daughter, but whatever you do for your neighbor, you do for Me."

O my Jesus, give me wisdom, give me a mind great an enlightened by Your light, and this only, that I may know You better, O Lord. For the better I get to know You, the more ardently will I love You, the sole object of My love. In You my soul drowns, in You my heart dissolves. I know not how to love partially, but only with the full strength of my soul and the total ardor of my heart. You yourself, O Lord, have enkindled this love of mine for You; in You my heart has drowned forever.

March 22, 1937. As I was talking, today, to a certain person, I recognized that she was suffering greatly in spirit, although exteriorly she pretended that she was very happy and was not suffering at all. I felt inspired to tell her that what was troubling her was a temptation. When I disclosed to her what was torturing her, she burst into tears and told me that she had come to see me precisely to speak to me, because she felt that it would bring her relief. The suffering was of such a kind that the soul was being attracted by God's grace on the one hand and by the world on the other. She was going through a terrible struggle that brought her to the point of weeping like a little child. But she went away soothed and set at peace.

During Holy Mass, I saw the Lord Jesus nailed upon the cross amidst great torments. A soft moan issued from His Heart. After some time, He said, "I thirst. I thirst for the salvation of souls. Help Me, My daughter, to save souls. Join your sufferings to My Passion and offer them to the heavenly Father for sinners."

When I see that the burden is beyond my strength, I do not consider or analyze it or probe into it, but I run like a child to the Heart of Jesus and say only one word to Him: "You can do all things". And then I keep silent, because I know that Jesus himself will intervene in the matter, and as for me, instead of tormenting myself, I use that time to love Him.


Monday of Holy Week. I asked the Lord to let me take part in His Sorrowful Passion that I might experience in soul and body, to the extent that this is possible for a creature, His bitter Passion. I asked to experience all the bitterness, in so far as this was possible. And the Lord answered that He would give me this grace, and that on Thursday, after Holy Communion, He would grant this in a special way.

This evening, a certain young man was dying; he was suffering terribly. For his intention, I began to say the chaplet which the Lord had taught me. I said it all, but the agony continued. I wanted to start the Litany of the Saints, but suddenly I heard the words, "Say the Chaplet". I understood that the soul needed the special help of prayers and great mercy. And so I locked myself in my room and fell prostrate before God and begged for mercy upon that soul. Then I felt the great majesty of God and His great Justice. I trembled with fear, but did not stop begging the Lord's mercy for that soul. Then I took the cross of my breast, the crucifix I had received when making my vows, and I put it on the breast of the dying man and said to the Lord, "Jesus, look on this soul with the same love with which You looked on my holocaust on the day of my perpetual vows, and by the power of the promise which You made to me in respect to the dying and those who would invoke Your mercy on them (grant this man the grace of a happy death)". His suffering then ceased, and he died peacefully. Oh how much we should pray for the dying! Let us take advantage of mercy while there is still time for mercy.

I realize more and more how much every soul needs God's mercy throughout life and particularly at the hour of death. This chaplet mitigates God's anger, as He Himself told me.

I find myself so weak that were it not for Holy Communion I would fall continually. One thing alone sustains me, and that is Holy Communion. From it I draw my strength; in it is all my comfort. I fear life on days when I do not receive Holy Communion. I fear my own self. Jesus concealed in the Host is everything to me. From the tabernacle I draw strength, power. courage and light. Here, I seek consolation in time of anguish. I would not know how to give glory to God if I did not have the Eucharist in my heart.

My beloved native land, Poland, if only you knew how many sacrifices and prayers I offer to God for you! But be watchful and give glory to God, who lifts you up and singles you out in a special way. But know how to be grateful

I suffer great pain at the sight of suffering of others. All these sufferings are reflected in my heart. I carry their torments in my heart so that it even wears me out physically. I would like all pains to fall upon me as to bring relief to my neighbor.

Amid terrible torments, I fix my eyes on You my God, and though a storm is gathering over my head, I know the sun is not extinguished. Nor do I wonder at the deceitfulness of creatures, but I accept in advance whatever may happen. My lips are silent, while my ears are satiated with derision. I strive for silence in my heart amidst the greatest sufferings, and I protect myself against all attacks with the shield of Your Name.

An ardent desire for this Feast is burning up my whole soul. In fervent prayer for the hastening of the Feast I find some relief, and I have begun a novena for the intention of certain priests that God may grant them light and inspiration to apply for the promulgation of this Feast, and that the Spirit of God inspire the Holy Father regarding the entire matter.

The novena consists of an hour of adoration before the Blessed Sacrament. I have implored God to hasten this Feast and have asked the Holy Spirit to inspire certain people regarding this whole matter. I am finishing this novena on Holy Thursday.


March 23, 1937. Today is the seventh day of the novena. I have received a great and inconceivable grace: the Most Merciful Jesus has promised that I will be present at the celebration of this solemn Feast. This day, the 23rd, that is Tuesday of Holy Week, is a day on which the Lord has granted me many graces.

Suddenly, God's presence took hold of me, and at once I saw myself in Rome, in the Holy Father's chapel. And at the same time I was in our chapel and, in a very special way, with Our Congregation. And I took part in the solemn celebration simultaneously here and in Rome, for the celebration was so closely connected with Rome that, even as I write, I cannot distinguish the two but I am writing it down as I saw it. I saw the Lord Jesus in our chapel, exposed in the monstrance on the high altar. The chapel was adorned as for a feast, and on that day anyone who wanted to come was allowed in. The crowd was so enormous that the eye could not take it all in. Everyone was participating in the celebrations with great joy, and many of them obtained what they desired. The same celebration was held in Rome, in a beautiful Church, and the Holy Father, with all the clergy, was celebrating this Feast, and then suddenly I saw Saint Peter, who stood between the altar and the Holy Father. I could not hear what Saint Peter said but I saw that the Holy Father understood his words...

Then some clergy whom I did not know began to examine me and to humiliate me, or rather, what I had written; but I saw how Jesus himself was defending me and giving them to understand what they did not know.

Then suddenly, I saw how the two rays, as painted in the image, issued from the Host and spread over the whole world. This lasted only a moment, but it seemed as though it had lasted all day, and our chapel was overcrowded all day long, and the whole day abounded in joy.

Then suddenly I saw on our altar the living Lord Jesus, just as He is depicted in the image. Yet I felt that the sisters and all the people did not see the Lord Jesus as I saw Him. Jesus looked with great kindness and joy at the Holy Father, at certain priests, and the entire clergy, at the people and at our Congregation.

Then, in an instant, I was caught up to stand near Jesus, and I stood on the altar next to the Lord Jesus, and my spirit was filled with a happiness so great that I am unable to comprehend it or write about it. A profound peace as well as repose filled my soul. Jesus bent toward me and said with great kindness, "What is it you desire, My daughter?" And I answered, "I desire worship and glory be given to Your mercy." "I already am receiving worship by the institution and celebration of this Feast; what else do you desire?" I then looked at the immense crowd worshiping the Divine Mercy and I said to the Lord, "Jesus, bless all those who are gathered to give glory to You and to venerate Your infinite mercy". Jesus made a sign of the cross with His hand, and this blessing was reflected in the souls like a flash of light. My spirit was engulfed in His love. I felt as if I had dissolved and disappeared completely in God. When I came to myself, a profound peace was flooding my soul, and an extraordinary understanding of many things was communicated to my intellect, an understanding that had not been granted to me previously.

I am immensely happy, although I am the least of all; and I would not change anything of what God has given me. I would not to change places even with a Seraph, I would not want to change places even with a Seraph, as regard the interior knowledge of God which He himself has given me. The intimate knowledge I have of the Lord is such as no creature can comprehend, particularly, the depth of His mercy that envelops me. I am happy with everything You give me.


March 24, 1937. Wednesday of Holy Week. My heart is languishing for God. I desire to become united with Him. A faint fear pierces my soul and the same time a kind of flame of love sets my heart on fire. Love and suffering are united in my heart.

I felt great sufferings in my body, but I feel the Lord is upholding me, for otherwise I would not be able to bear it.

O my Jesus, I beg You on behalf of the whole Church: Grant it love and the light of Your Spirit, and give power to the words of priests so that hardened hearts might be brought to repentance and return to You. O Lord, Lord, give us holy priests; You yourself maintain them in holiness. O Divine and Great High Priest, may the power of your mercy accompany them everywhere and protect them from the devil's traps and snares which are continually being set for the souls of priests. May the power of Your mercy, O Lord, shatter and bring to naught all that might tarnish the sanctity of priests, for You can do all things.

March 25, 1937. Holy Thursday. During Holy Mass, I saw the Lord, who said to me, "Lean your head on My breast and rest." The Lord pressed me to His Heart and said, "I shall give you a small portion of My Passion, but do not be afraid, be brave! do not seek relief, but accept everything with submission to My will."

When Jesus was taking leave of me, such great pain filled my soul that it is impossible to express it. Physical strength left me; I left the chapel quickly and went to bed. I was oblivious of what was going on around me, My soul was filled with longing for the Lord, and all the bitterness of His Divine Heart was imparted to me. This lasted for about three hours. I asked the Lord to protect me from the eyes of those around me. Although I wanted to, I could not take any food all day, until evening.

I earnestly desired to spend the whole night with Jesus in the dark prison cell. I prayed until eleven o'clock. At eleven, the Lord said to me, "Lie down and take your rest. I have let you experience in three hours what I suffered during the whole night.." And I immediately I went to bed.

I had no physical strength left: the suffering had deprived me of it completely. Throughout all this time, I had been in a sort of swoon. Every beat of Jesus' Heart was reflected in my heart and pierced my soul. If these tortures had concerned me only, I would have suffered less; but as I looked at the One whom my heart has loved with all, all its might and saw the He was suffering, and that I could not bring Him any relief, my heart dissolved in love and bitterness. I was dying with Him, and yet I could not die. But I would not have an exchanged that martyrdom for all the pleasures in the whole world. In the course of this suffering, my love grew immeasurably. I know that the Lord was supporting me with His omnipotence, for otherwise I would not have been able to endure it for even a moment. Together with Him, I underwent, in a special way, all the various tortures. The world still has no idea of all the Jesus suffered. I accompanied Him to the Garden of Gethsemane; I stayed with Him in the prison; I went with Him before the judges; I underwent with Him each of the tortures. Not a single one of His movements or looks escaped my notice. I came to know all the omnipotence of His love and of His mercy towards souls.


March 26, 1937. Friday. In the morning, I at once felt the torture of His five wounds in my body. This suffering continued until three o'clock. Although there is no outward sign of it, the torture is no less painful. I am glad that Jesus is protecting me from peoples eyes.

At eleven o'clock Jesus said to me, "My host, you are refreshment for My tormented Heart." I thought after these words, that my heart would burn up. And He brought me into such close intimacy with Himself that my heart was espoused to His Heart in a loving union, and I could feel the faintest stir of His Heart in a loving union and I could feel the faintest stir of His Heart and He, of mine. The fire of my created love was joined to the ardor of His eternal love. This one grace surpasses all others in its immensity. His Trinitarian Being enveloped me entirely, and I am totally immersed in Him. My littleness is, as it were, wrestling with this Immortal Mighty One. I am immersed in incomprehensible love and incomprehensible torture because of His Passion. All that concerns His Being is imparted to me also.

Up to now, Jesus has been bringing me to know about, and to have a presentiment of, this grace, but today He granted it to me. I would not even dare to dream about it. My heart is in ceaseless ecstasy, as it were, although outwardly nothing disturbs my contacts with my neighbor or my attending to various matters. Nothing is capable of interrupting my ecstasy, nor can anyone suspect it, because I have asked God to protect me from detection by people. And, together with this grace, there entered my soul a whole ocean of light, enabling me to understand God and myself. Amazement overwhelms me entirely and leads me as if into a new ecstasy (aroused by the fact) that God has deigned to descend to me, who am so little.

At three o'clock, I prayed prostrate, in the form of a cross, for the whole world. Jesus' mortal life was coming to an end. I heard His seven words; then He looked at me and said, "Beloved daughter of My Heart, you are my solace amidst terrible torments".

Jesus is commanding me to make a novena before the Feast of Mercy, and today I am to begin it for the conversion of the world and for the recognition of the Divine Mercy.... "so that every soul will praise My goodness. I desire trust from My creatures. Encourage souls to place great trust in My fathomless mercy. Let the weak, sinful soul have no fear to approach Me, for even if it had more sins than there are grains of sand in the world, all would be drowned in the unmeasurable depths of My mercy."

When Jesus had given up His last breath, my soul dissolved from the pain and for a long time I could not come to myself. I found some relief in tears. The One whom my heart had come to love has died. Will anyone understand my grief?

In the evening, over the radio, I heard hymns; that is, psalms, sung by priests. I burst into tears, and all of the pain was renewed in my soul, and I wept sorrowfully, unable to find appeasement in this pain. Then I heard a voice in my soul: "Do not cry; I am not suffering anymore. And for the faithfulness with which you accompanied Me in My sufferings and death, your own death will be a solemn one, and I will accompany you in that last hour. Beloved pearl of My Heart, I see your love so pure, purer than that of the angels, and all the more so because you keep on fighting. For your sake I bless the world. I see your efforts to please Me, and they delight My Heart." After these words, I wept no more, but thanked the heavenly Father for having sent us His Son and for the work of the Redemption of mankind.


I made an hour of adoration in thanksgiving for the graces which had been granted me and for my illness. Illness also is a great grace. I have been ill for four months, but I do not recall having wasted so much as a minute of it. All has been for God and souls; I want to be faithful to Him everywhere.

During this adoration, I realized the utter care and goodness that Jesus has been lavishing upon me and the protection He has given me against all evil. I thank You especially, Jesus, for visiting me in my solitude, and I thank You also for inspiring my superiors to send me for this treatment. Give them, Jesus, the omnipotence of Your blessing and compensate them for all the losses incurred because of me.

Today, Jesus is bidding me to comfort and reassure a certain soul who has opened herself to me and told me about her difficulties. This soul is pleasing to the Lord, but she is not aware of it. God is keeping her in deep humility. I have carried out the Lord's directives.

O my most sweet Master, good Jesus, I give You my heart. You shape and mold it after Your liking. O fathomless love, I open the calyx of my heart to You alone, my Betrothed, is known the fragrance of the flower of my heart. Let the fragrance of my sacrifice be pleasing to You. O Immortal God, my ever lasting delight, already here on earth, You are my heaven. May every beat of my heart be a new hymn of praise to You, O Holy Trinity! Had I as many hearts as there are drops of water in the oceans or grains of sand in the whole world, I would offer them all to You, O my Love, O Treasure of my heart! Whomever shall I meet in my life, no matter who they may be, I want to draw them all to love You, O my Jesus, my Beauty, my Repose, my sole Master, Judge, Savior and Spouse, all in one; I know that one title will modify the other - I have entrusted everything to Your mercy.

My Jesus, support me when difficult and stormy days come, days of testing, days of ordeal, when suffering and fatigue begin to oppress my body and my soul. Sustain me, Jesus, and give me strength to bear suffering. Set a guard upon my lips that they may address no word of complaint to creatures. Your most merciful Heart is all my hope. I have nothing for my defense but only Your mercy; in it lies all my trust.

March 27, 1937. Today, I returned from Pradnik, after nearly four months of treatment. For everything I give great thanks to God. I have made use of every moment to glorify God. When I went to the chapel for a moment, I realized how much I would have to suffer and struggle, with regard to this whole matter. O Jesus, my strength, You alone can help me; grant me fortitude.

March 28. Resurrection. During the Mass of Resurrection, I saw the Lord in beauty and splendor, and He said to me, "My daughter, peace be with you." He blessed me and disappeared, and my soul was filled with gladness and joy beyond words. My heart was fortified for struggle and sufferings.

Today, I had a conversation with Father (Andrasz) and he recommended great caution in the matter of these sudden appearances of the Lord Jesus. When he was speaking about divine mercy, some sort of strength and power entered my heart. My God, I want so much to express everything and am so very unable to do so. Father tells me that the Lord Jesus is very generous in communicating himself to souls and, on the hand, He is so to speak, stingy. "Although God's generosity is very great" said Father, " be careful anyway, although personally I do not see anything wrong here, or anything contrary to faith. Be a little bit more careful, and when Mother Superior comes, you can talk to her about these things.


March 29. 1937. During meditation today, I saw the Lord in great beauty, and He said to me, "Peace be with you, My daughter." My whole soul trembled with love for Him and I said, "O Lord, although I love You with all my heart, please do not appear to me, because my spiritual director has told me that these sudden appearances of Yours arouse suspicion that You could be an illusion. And although I love You more than my own life, and I know that You are my Lord and God, who are communing with me, I must above all be obedient to my confessor."

Jesus listened to my words with gravity and kindness and spoke these words to me: "Tell your confessor that I commune with your soul in such an intimate manner because you do not steal My gifts, and this is why I pour all these graces upon your soul, because I know that you will not hoard them for yourself. But as a sign that his prudence is agreeable to Me, You shall not see Me, and I will not appear to you in this way until you have given him an account of what I have just said."

April 2, 1937. In the morning during Mass, I heard these words: "Tell the superior that I want adoration to take place here for the intention of imploring My mercy for the whole world".

O my Jesus, You alone know what my heart is going through. O Strength, You can do all things, and though I expose myself to great sufferings, I shall always remain faithful to You because I am sustained by you singular grace.

April 3. 1937. Today, the Lord said to me, "Tell the Reverend Professor (probably Father Theodore) that I desire that in the Feast of My mercy he deliver a sermon about My fathomless mercy." I fulfilled God's wish, but the priest did not want to acknowledge God's message. When I left the confessional, I heard these words: Do as I tell you and be at peace; this matter is between him and Me. You will not be held responsible for this."

April 4, 1937. Low Sunday; that is the Feast of Mercy. In the morning, after Holy Communion, my soul was immersed in the Godhead. I was united to the three Divine Persons in such away that when I was united to Jesus, I was simultaneously united to the Father and to the Holy Spirit. My soul was flooded with joy beyond understanding, and the Lord gave me to experience the whole ocean and abyss of His fathomless mercy. Oh, if only souls would want to understand how much God loves them! All comparisons, even if they were the most tender and the most vehement, are but a mere shadow when set against the reality.

When I was united to the Lord, I came to know how many souls are glorifying God's mercy.

When I went for adoration, I heard these words: "My beloved daughter, write down these words, that today My Heart has rested in this convent (the Cracow house) Tell the world about My mercy and My love.

"The flames of mercy are burning Me. I desire to pour them out upon human souls. Oh, what pain they cause Me when they do not want to accept them!

"My daughter, do what ever is within your power to spread devotion to My mercy. I will make up for what you lack. Tell aching mankind to snuggle close to My merciful Heart, and I will fill it with peace.

"Tell (all people) My daughter, that I am Love and Mercy itself. When a soul approaches Me with trust, I fill it with such an abundance of graces that it cannot contain them within itself, but radiates them to other souls.

"Souls who spread the honor of My mercy I shield through their entire lives as a tender mother, her infant, and at the hour of death I will not be a Judge for them, but the Merciful Savior. At that last hour, a soul has nothing with which to defend itself except My mercy. Happy is the soul that during its lifetime immersed itself in the Fountain of Mercy, because justice will have no hold on it.

"Write this: Everything that exists is enclosed in the bowels of My mercy, more deeply than an infant in its mother's womb. How painful distrust of My goodness wounds Me! Sins of distrust wound Me most painfully."

During Holy Mass, the Directress of Novices (Sister Callista) played a beautiful hymn about the mercy of God. I then asked the Lord to give her a deeper knowledge of the abyss of this inconceivable mercy.

When I was saying good night to the Lord before retiring, I head these words, "Host, dear to My Heart, for your sake I bless the earth."


April 7, 1937. Today, when a certain person entered the chapel, I felt a terrible pain in my hands, my feet and my side, just as Jesus did during His Passion. This lasted only for a brief moment. But in this way I recognize a soul who was not in God's grace.

On one occasion I saw the Holy Father reflecting about this matter (presumably the establishment of the Feast of the Divine Mercy).

April 10, 1937. Today, Mother Superior gave me an article about the Divine Mercy to read, and with it there was also a reproduction of the image that had been painted. The article appeared in the Vilnius Weekly and was sent to us in Cracow by Father Michael Sopoko, that zealous apostle of the Divine Mercy. In this article are included words that the Lord Jesus has spoken to me, some of them quoted verbatim.

When I took the issue of the weekly into my hands, an arrow of love pierced my soul. - For the sake of your ardent desires, I am hastening the Feast of Mercy". My spirit burst into such a powerful flame of love that it seemed to me that I was totally dissolved in God.

That beautiful soul that is spreading this work of divine mercy throughout the world is, by his deep humility, very pleasing to God.

Before every major grace, my soul undergoes a test of patience, for I feel the grace, but do not yet possess it. My spirit burns with impatience, but the hour has not yet come. These moments are so very extraordinary that it is difficult to describe them.

April 13, 1937. Today I must stay in bed all day. I had a violent fit of coughing, which has left me so weak that I have no strength to walk. My spirit is eager to do God's work, but physical strength has left me. I cannot penetrate Your actions at this moment, O Lord; therefore, I keep repeating with a loving act of the will: do with me as You please.

Although the temptations are strong, a whole wave of doubts beats against my soul, and discouragement stands by, ready to enter into the act, the Lord however strengthens my will, against which all the attempts of the enemy are shattered as if against a rock. I see how many actual graces God grants me; these support me ceaselessly. I am very weak, and I attribute everything solely to the grace of God.

When one day I resolved to practice a certain virtue, I lapsed into the vice opposed to that virtue ten times more frequently than on other days. In the evening, I was reflecting on why, today, I had lapsed so extraordinarily, and I heard the words: "You were counting too much on yourself and too little on Me". And I understood the cause of my lapses.


Sudden return of health.
After I had written a letter to Father Sopoko on Sunday, April 11, I suddenly became so very ill that I did not send that letter, but waited for a clear sign of God's will. However, my health got so bad that I had to go to bed. The coughing racked me so much that it seemed to me that, if this repeats a few more times, it will surely be then end of me.

On April 14, I felt so bad that I barely managed to get up to assist at Holy Mass. I felt much worse than I did at the time they sent me for treatment. There was wheezing, and there was rattling noises in my lungs and strange pains. When I received Holy Communion, I don't know why, but it was as if something were urging me to this prayer, and I began to pray in this manner: "Jesus, may Your pure and healthy blood circulate in my ailing organism, and may Your pure and healthy body transform my weak body, and may a healthy and vigorous life life throb within me, if it is truly Your holy will that I should set about the work in question; and this will be a clear sign of Your holy will for me".

As I was praying in this way, I suddenly felt as if something were jolting my whole organism and, in an instant, I felt completely well. My breath is clear, as if there had never been anything the matter with my lungs, and I feel no pain, and this is a sign for me that I should set about this work.

And this happened on the last day of my novena to the Holy Spirit. After this return to health, I found myself united with the Lord Jesus in a purely spiritual way. Jesus gave me strong assurances; that is, He confirmed me in respect to His demands. I remained close to the Lord Jesus all that day and talked with Him about the details concerning that Congregation.

Jesus infused my soul with power and courage to act. Now I understand that if the Lord demands something of a soul, He gives it the means to carry it out, and through grace He makes it capable of doing this. So, even if the soul be utterly miserable, at the Lord's command it can undertake things beyond its expectation, because this is the sign by which it can be known that the Lord is with that soul: if God's power and strength, which make the soul courageous and valiant, is manifest within it. As for myself, I am always at first a bit frightened at the Lord's greatness, but afterwards my soul is filled with profound peace which nothing can disturb, as well as an inner strength to do what the Lord is demanding at that particular moment.....Then I heard these words: "Go tell the superior that you are in good health".

I neither know, nor ask how long I will remain in good health. I only know that I am enjoying good health at present. The future does not belong to me. I asked for this health as evidence of God's will and not in order to seek relief from my suffering.

April 16, 1937. Today, as God's Majesty swept over me, my soul understood that the Lord, so very great though He is, delights in humble souls. The more a soul humbles itself, the greater the kindness with which the Lord approaches it. Uniting himself closely with it. He raises it to His very throne. Happy is the soul whom the Lord himself defends. I have come to know that only love is of any value; love is greatness; nothing, no works, can compare with a single act of pure love of God.

O Jesus, shield me with Your mercy and also judge me leniently, or else Your justice may rightly damn me.


April 17. Today, during catechetical lecture (by Father Theodore), I was given confirmation of what I had understood interiorly and lived by for quite some time; namely, that if a soul loves God sincerely and is intimately united in Him, then even though such a soul may be living in the midst of difficult external circumstances, nothing can disturb its interior life; and in the midst of corruption, it can remain pure and unsullied; because the great love of God gives it strength for battle, and God also protects in a special way, even in a miraculous way, a soul that loves Him sincerely.

When, one day, God gave me the inner knowledge that I had never lost my innocence, and that despite all dangers in which I had found myself, He himself had been guarding me so that the virginity of my soul and heart would remain intact, I spent the day in fervent interior thanksgiving. I thanked God that He had been pleased to protect me from evil, and also for this: that I had found favor in His eyes, that He himself had given me assurance of this.

And a few years later, He deigned to confirm me in this grace, and since that time I have not experienced the rebellion of the senses against the soul. I have written this down in greater detail elsewhere in my diary (cf. Paragraph no. 40). As often as I recall this inconceivable grace, a fresh flame of love and gratitude to God bursts forth from my heart; and this same love leads me to complete forgetfulness of self.

Since that time I have been living under the virginal cloak of the Mother of God. She has been guarding me and instructing me. I am quite at peace, close to Her Immaculate Heart. Because I am so weak and inexperienced, I nestle like a child close to Her heart.

Although God has confirmed me in this virtue, I am, however, constantly on the watch and fear even my own shadow, but this only because I have come to love God intensely.

This grace from God was given to me precisely because I was the weakest of all people; this is why the Almighty has surrounded me with His special mercy.

April 24. I can sense every major grace in advance; a strange longing and desire for God comes over me, and then I wait for the grace, and the greater the grace, the more distinct is the presentiment, and the fiercer is my struggle with the adversary of my salvation.

My soul is sometimes in such a condition that I can only describe it by means of a comparison: there are two great friends, and one of them is giving a great feast and has invited the other; both of them are looking forward to it; but the hour of the feast has been set. Well, the moments just before receiving the grace are so violent that it is difficult to describe them. They are marked by painful longing and the fire of love. I can feel the Lord is there, but I cannot be completely absorbed in Him, because the hour has been designated. Often, before such a moment of grace, I am utterly destitute in mind, will and heart. I am left all alone, and I wait for the One God. He himself effects this in me before His coming.


April 23, 1937. I have begun a three-day retreat today.
In the evening, I heard these words in my soul: "My daughter, know that I shall speak to you in a special way through this priest (Father Plaza) so that you may not yield to doubt concerning My wishes." Already in the first meditation my soul was struck by the following words of the priest: I must not oppose God's will and God's designs, whatever they might be; and as soon as I am convinced of the certitude and the authenticity of the will of God, I have the duty of carrying it out. No one can release me from this. Whatever the will of God may be, once I come to know it, I ought to carry it out. This is just a very short summary, but the whole meditation imprinted itself on my soul, and I have no doubts about anything. I know what God wants for me, and what I ought to do.

There are, in my life, times and moments of spiritual insight; that is, divine illuminations, when the soul receives inward instruction about things it has not read in any book and has not been taught by any person. These are times of great inner knowledge which God himself imparts to the soul. These are great mysteries... I often receive light and the knowledge of the interior life of God and of God's intimate disposition, and this fills me with unutterable trust and a joy that I cannot contain within myself; I desire to dissolve completely in Him.....

The quintessence of love is sacrifice and suffering. Truth wears a crown of thorns. Prayer involves the intellect, the will, and the emotions.

Today there was a beautiful teaching (by Father Plaza) on the goodness and mercy of God. During this conference my soul experienced the flames of God's love, and I understood that God's word is a living word.

My particular examen is still the same; namely union with the merciful Christ, and silence.

The flower which I lay at the feet of the Mother of God for May is my practice of silence.

Virtue without prudence is not virtue at all. We should often pray to the Holy Spirit for this grace of prudence. Prudence consists in discretion, rational reflection and courageous resolution. The final decision is always up to us. We must decide; we can and we ought to seek advice and light...

Today during meditation, God gave me inner light and the understanding as to what sanctity is and of what it consists. Although I have heard these things many times in conferences, the soul understands them in a different way when it comes to know them through the light of God which illumines it.

Neither graces, nor revelations, nor raptures, nor gifts granted to the soul with God. These gifts are merely ornaments of the soul, but constitute neither its essence nor its perfection. My sanctity and perfection consists in the close union of my will with the will of God. God never violates our free will. It is up to us will. It is up to us whether we want to receive God's grace or not. It is up to us whether we will cooperate with it or waste it.

In the last evening conference, which was a preparation for the renewal of vows, Father was speaking about the happiness that flows from the three vows, and about the reward that comes from observing them faithfully. Suddenly, my soul was thrown into great interior darkness. My soul was filled with bitterness instead of joy, and my heart was pierced with a sharp pain. I felt so miserable and unworthy of this grace and, conscious of my misery and unworthiness, I would not have dared to so much as approach the feet of the youngest postulant to kiss them. I saw the postulants, in spirit, beautiful and pleasing to the Lord; and myself an abyss of misery. After the conference, I flung myself at the feet of the hidden God, midst tears and pain. I threw myself into the sea of God's infinite mercy, and only there did I experience relief and feel that all of His omnipotent mercy was enveloping me.


This is the day for the renewal of vows.
Immediately upon my awakening, God's presence enveloped me, and I felt I was a child of God. Divine love was poured into my soul, and God gave me to see how everything depended on His will. He spoke these words to me: "I want to grant a complete pardon to the souls that will go to Confession and receive Holy Communion on the Feast of Mercy." Then He said, "My daughter, fear nothing. I am always with you, even if it seems to you that I am not. Your humility draws Me down from My lofty throne, and I unite Myself closely with you."

29 (April 1937). The Lord gave me to know about the disputes that were going on in the Vatican concerning this Feast. The dignitary Pacelli did much work on this.

Today is the renewal; that is, the profession of vows in the course of a solemn celebration. As the sisters were making their vows I heard angels singing in various tones, "Holy, Holy, Holy," with chanting so delightful that no human tongue could ever match it.

In the afternoon, I talked with my beloved Mother Directress of Novices, Mother Mary Joseph. We walked once around the garden, and I was able to have a talk with her, although it was a rather general one. She is ever the same beloved Mother Directress of Novices, although she is in fact no longer the directress, but a Superior, and it is already ten years since I pronounced my vows. She told me that it is not impossible for a religious to live without the cross. However, she revealed to me a certain suffering which I had experienced in Warsaw, although I had never told her about it. All the graces which I had received during the novitiate came back vividly before my eyes of my soul. Oh, how grateful I am to her! When my soul was plunged in darkness, and it seemed to me that I was damned, she wrenched me from that abyss by the power of obedience.

My soul is often burdened with suffering, and there is no human being who can understand these torments.

May 1, 1937. Today I felt the nearness of My Mother, my heavenly Mother, although before every Holy Communion I earnestly ask the Mother, although before every Holy Communion I earnestly ask the Mother of God to help me prepare my soul for the coming of Her Son, and I clearly feel Her protection over me. I entreat Her to be so gracious as to enkindle in me the fire of God's love such as burned in Her own pure heart at the time of the Incarnation of the Word of God.

May 4. Today I went to see Mother General (Michael) for a moment and asked her, "Dear Mother, have you had any inspiration regarding my leaving the convent?" Mother General answered, "Until the present Sister, I have always restrained you, but now I leave you complete freedom to choose to do as you wish; you can leave the Congregation or you can stay." So I answered "Very well". I thought of writing immediately to the Holy Father to ask him to release me from my vows. When I left the Mother General, darkness once again descended upon my soul, as it had in the past. It is strange that each time I ask to leave the Congregation, this darkness invades my soul, and I feel as though I have been left completely on my own. While experiencing this torment of the spirit, I decided to go immediately to Mother and tell her about my strange torment and struggle. Mother answered, "That leaving of yours is a temptation". After talking to her for a while I felt some relief, but the darkness persisted. "This Divine Mercy is a beautiful thing, and it must be a great work of the Lord, since Satan opposes it so much and wants to describe it". Such were the words of our beloved Mother General.

No one can understand or comprehend, nor can I myself describe my torments. But there can be no sufferings of the martyrs are not greater because, at times, death would be a relief for me. There is nothing to which I can compare these sufferings, this endless agony of the soul.

May 5, (1937). Today, I opened up my soul somewhat in confession, because it occurred to me that perhaps this is the real temptation: that at the time I ask to be allowed to leave the Congregation I experience such great suffering and darkness. To this the confessor replied that perhaps it was not the time appointed by God. "You must pray and wait patiently, but it is true that great sufferings are in store for you. You will have to bear many sufferings and overcome many difficulties; that much is certain. It would be better to wait and to pray for deeper knowledge and for divine light. These are grave matters".

My God! In these difficult moments my spiritual director (Father Andrasz) is away, for he has gone to Rome. Jesus, since You have taken him away from me, guide me Yourself, because You alone know how much I can bear. I trust in His mercy.

In the moments when I am between heaven and earth, I keep silent, because even if I did speak, who would understand what I say? Eternity will reveal many things about which I am not silent...

When I went out into the garden, I saw how everything was breathing the joy of spring. The trees, adorned with flowers, gave off an intoxicating odor. Everything was throbbing with joy, and the birds were singing and chirping their adoration of God and said to me, "Rejoice and be happy, Sister Faustina", but my soul remains in torment and darkness. My soul is so sensitive to the rustle of grace (that) it knows how to talk with all created things and with everything that surrounds me, and I know why God has adorned the earth in this way....But my heart cannot be joyful because my Beloved has hidden Himself from me, and I will not rest until I find Him...I do not know how to live without God, but I also feel that God, absolutely self-sufficent though He is, cannot be happy without me...


May 6, (1937). The Ascension of Our Lord.
Since early this morning, my soul has been touched by God. After Holy Communion, I communed for a while with the heavenly Father. My soul was drawn into the glowing center of love. I understood that no exterior works could stand comparison with pure love of God.... I saw the joy of the Incarnate Word, and I was immersed in the Divine Trinity. When I came to myself, longing filled my soul, and I earned to be united with God. Such tremendous love for the heavenly Father enveloped me that I call this day an uninterrupted ecstasy of love. The whole universe seemed to me like a tiny drop in comparison with God. There is no greater happiness than when God gives me to know interiorly that every beat of my heart is pleasing to Him, and when He shows me that He loves me in a special way. This strong inner conviction, by which God assures me of His love for me and of how much my soul pleases Him, brings deep peace to my soul. Throughout this day I was unable to take any food; I felt gratified to the full with love.

God of great mercy, who deigned to send us Your only - begotten Son as the greatest proof of Your fathomless love and mercy, You do not reject sinners; but in Your boundless mercy You have opened for them also Your treasures, treasures from which they can draw abundantly, not only justification, but also the sanctity that a soul can attain. Father of great mercy, I desire that all hearts turn with confidence to Your infinite mercy. No one will be justified before You is he is not accompanied by Your unfathomable mercy. When You reveal the mystery of Your mercy to us, there will not be enough of eternity to properly thank You for it.

Oh, how sweet it is to have in the depths of one's soul that which the Church tells us we must believe. When my soul is immersed in love, I solve the most intricate questions clearly and quickly. Only love is able to cross over precipices and mountain peaks. Love, once again, love.

12 (May 1937). A strange darkness sometimes invades my intellect. I am submerged in nothingness against my will.

May 20. 1937. When for a whole month I had been enjoying good health, it occurred to me that I did not know which was more pleasing to the Lord - my serving Him in illness or in the robust health for which I had asked Him - and I said to the Lord, "Jesus, do with me as You please," and Jesus returned me to my previous condition.

Oh, how sweet it is to live in a convent among sisters, but I must not forget that these angels are in human bodies.

On one occasion, I saw Satan hurrying about and looking for someone among the sisters, but he could find no one. I felt an interior inspiration to command him in the Name of God to confess to me what he was looking for among the sisters. And he confessed, though unwillingly, "I am looking for idle souls (Si. 33:28; pr. 12:11)." When I commanded him again in the Name of God to tell me to which souls in the religious life he has the easiest access, he said, again unwillingly, "To lazy and idle souls". I took note of the fact that, at present, there were no such souls in this house. Let the toiling and tired souls rejoice.

May 22, 1937. The heat is so intense today that it is difficult to bear. We are all thirsting for rain, and still it does not come. For several days the sky has been overcast, but there is no rain. When I looked at the plants, thirsting for the rain, I was moved with pity, and I decided to say the chaplet until the Lord would send us rain. Before supper, the sky covered over with clouds, and a heavy rain fell upon the earth. I had been saying this prayer without interruption for three hours. And the Lord let me know that everything can be obtained by means of this prayer.


(May) 23. The Feast of the Most Holy Trinity.
During Holy Mass, I found myself suddenly united with the Most Holy Trinity. I recognized His majesty and greatness. I was united to the Three Persons. And once I was united to One of these Most Venerable Persons, I was at the same time united to the other Two Persons. The joy and happiness that my soul felt is beyond description. It grieves me that I am unable to put down in words that which has no words. I heard these words: "Tell the Superior General to count on you as the most faithful daughter in the Order."

After these words, I received an inner understanding of what all created things are before God. Immense and incomprehensible it is His majesty. And that He condescends towards us is the abyss of His mercy...

All things will have an end in this vale of tears, Tears will run dry and pains will cease. Only one thing will remain - Love for You O Lord.

All things will have an end in this exile. The ordeals and wilderness of the soul. And though she live in perpetual agony, if God is with her, nothing can shake her.

27 (May 1937). Corpus Christi.
During prayer, I heard these words: "My daughter, let your heart be filled with joy. I, the Lord, am with you. Fear nothing. You are in My Heart." At that moment, I knew the great majesty of God, and I understood that nothing could be compared with one single perception of God. Outward greatness dwindles like a speck of dust before one act of a deeper knowledge of God.

The Lord has poured such a depth of peace into my soul that nothing will disturb it any more. Despite everything that goes on around me, I am not deprived of my peace for a moment. Even if the whole world were crumbling, it would not disturb me the depth of the silence which is within me and in which God rests. All events, all the various things which happen are under His foot.

This deeper knowledge of God gives me full liberty and spiritual freedom, and nothing can disturb my close union with Him, not even the angelic powers. I feel that I am great when I am united to God. What happiness it is to have the consciousness of God on one's heart and to live in close intimacy with Him.

When the procession from Borek came to our house, carrying Him who was to reposed in our chapel, I heard a voice coming from the Host: "Here is My repose". During Benediction, Jesus gave me to know that soon a solemn moment would take place on this very spot. "I am pleased to rest in your heart and nothing will stop Me from granting you graces." This greatness of God floods my soul, and I drown in Him, I lose myself in Him, I am melting away in Him...


May 30, (1937). I am dying of yearning for God today. This longing fills all my soul. How very much I feel I am in exile. O Jesus, when will the longed for moment come?

May 31. My tormented soul finds aid nowhere but in You, O Living Host. I place all my trust in Your merciful heart. I am waiting patiently for your word, Lord.

Oh, what pain it causes my heart when I see a nun who has not the religious spirit! How can one be pleasing to God when one is inflated with pride and self love under the pretense for God's glory, while in fact one is seeking one's own glory? When I see such a thing, it gives me very great pain. How can such a soul be united closely with God? Union with the Lord is out of the question here.

June 1, 1937. Today, the Corpus Christi procession took place. At the first altar, a flame issued from the Host and pierced my heart, and I heard a voice, "Here is My resting place". My heart was enflamed, and I felt that I was transformed completely into Him.

In the evening He gave me to understand how fleeting all earthly things are, and (how) everything that appears great disappears like smoke, and does not give the soul freedom, but weariness. Happy the soul that understands these things and with only one foot touches the earth. My repose is to be united with You; everything else tires me. Oh, how much I feel I am in exile! I see that no one understands me, You who are hidden in my heart and yet are eternally alive.

June 4. Today is the Feast if the Most Sacred Heart of Jesus. During Holy Mass, I was given the knowledge of the Heart of Jesus and of the nature of the fire of love with which He burns for us and of how He is an Ocean of Mercy. Then I heard a voice: Apostle of My mercy, proclaim to the whole world My unfathomable mercy. Do not be discouraged by the difficulties you encounter in proclaiming My mercy. These difficulties that affect you so painfully are needed for your sanctification and as evidence that this work is Mine. My daughter, be diligent in writing down every sentence I tell you concerning My mercy, because this is meant for a great number of souls who will profit from it."

During Adoration, the Lord gave me a deeper knowledge of matters connected with this work.

Today, I asked the Lord's pardon for all the offenses committed in our convents from which His divine Heart suffers.

June 6, (1937). First Sunday of the month. Today I made my monthly retreat.

A light from the morning meditation: Whatever You do with me, Jesus, I will always love You, for I am Yours. Little matter whether You leave me here or put me somewhere else; I am always Yours.

It is with love that I abandon myself to Your most wise decrees. O God, and Your will O Lord, is my daily nourishment. You, who know the beatings of my heart, know that it beats for You alone, my Jesus. Nothing can quench my longing for You. I am dying for You, Jesus. When will You take me into Your dwelling place (cf. Jn 14:1-3)?

"(Let) the greatest sinners place their trust in My mercy. They have the right before others to trust in the abyss of My mercy. My daughter, write about My mercy towards tormented souls. Souls that make an appeal to My mercy, delight Me. To such souls I grant even more graces than they ask. I cannot punish even the greatest sinner if he makes an appeal to my compassion, but on the contrary, I justify him in My unfathomable and inscrutable mercy. Write: become I come as Just Judge, I first open wide the door of My mercy. He who refuses to pass through the door of My mercy must pass through the door of My justice..."

When once I felt hurt because of a certain thing and complained to the Lord, Jesus answered, "My daughter, why do you attach such importants to the teaching and the talk of people? I Myself want to teach you; that is why I arrange things so that you cannot attend those conferences. In a single moment, I will bring you to know more than others will acquire through many years of toil."


June 20 (1937). We resemble God most when we forgive our neighbors. God is Love, Goodness, and Mercy..

"Every soul, and especially the soul of every religious, should reflect My mercy. My Heart overflows with compassion and mercy for all.The heart of My beloved must resemble Mine: from her heart must spring the fountain of My mercy for souls; otherwise I will not acknowledge her as Mine."

On several occasions, I have learned how some religious defend their own glory under the pretext of being concerned for the glory of God, whereas it is not a question of the glory of God, but of glory of self. O Jesus, how painful this has been for me! What secrets the day of Your judgment will bring to light! How can one steal God's gifts?

Today, I experienced a good deal of sorrow because of a certain person, a lay person, that is. On the basis of one true thing, she said many things that were fictitious. And because they were taken to be true and spread around the whole house, when the news reached my ears, my heart felt a twinge of pain. How can one abuse the goodness of others like that? But I resolved not to say a word in my defense and to show even greater kindness towards that person. I became aware, however, that I was not strong enough to bear this calmly, because the matter lingered on for weeks. When I saw the storm building up and wind beginning to blow sand straight in my eyes, I went before the Blessed Sacrament and said to the Lord, "Lord Jesus, I ask You to give me the strength of Your actual grace, because I feel that I will not manage to survive this struggle. Shield me with your breast."

Then I heard the words, "Do not fear; I am with you." When I left the altar, an extraordinary peace and power filled my soul, and the storm that was raging broke against my soul as against a rock; and the foam of the storm fell on those who raised it. Oh, how good is the Lord, who will reward each one according to his deed! Let every soul beg for the help of actual grace, as sometimes ordinary grace is not enough.

When pain overwhelms my soul, And the horizon darkens like night, And the heart is torn with the torment of suffering, Jesus Crucified, You are my strength.

When the soul, dimmed with pain, Exerts itself in battle without respite, And the heart is in agony and torment, Jesus Crucified, You are the hope of my salvation.

And so the days pass, As the soul bathes in a sea of bitterness, And the heart dissolves in tears, Jesus Crucified, You shine for me like the dawn.

And when the cup of bitterness brims over, And all things conspire against her, And the soul goes down to the Garden of Olives, Jesus Crucified, in You is my defense.

When the soul, conscious of its innocence, Accepts these dispensations from God, The heart can then repay hurts with love. Jesus Crucified, transforms my weakness into omnipotence.

It is no easy thing to bear sufferings joyfully, especially those which are unmerited. Fallen nature rebels, and although the intellect and will are above suffering, because they are able to do good to those who inflict suffering on them, nevertheless the emotions raise a lot of noise and, like restless spirits, attack the intellect and will. But when they see they cannot do anything by themselves, they quiet down and submit to the intellect and will. Like some kind of hideousness, they rush in and stir up a row, bent on making one obey them alone so long as they are not curbed by the intellect and will.


June 23, (1937). As I was praying before the Most Blessed Sacrament, my physical sufferings cease suddenly, and I heard this voice in my soul: "You see, I can give you everything in one moment. I am not constrained by any law."

June 24. After holy Communion, I heard these words. "Know my daughter, that in one moment I can give you everything that is needed for the fulfillment of this task." After these words, an extraordinary light remained in my soul, and all God's demands seemed to me to be so simple that even a little child could carry them out.

(June) 27. Today, I saw the convent of the new Congregation. It was a large and spacious building. I went from room to room, observing everything. I saw that God's Providence had provided for all that was necessary. The persons living in this convent were still wearing lay clothes, but a thoroughly religious spirit reigned there, and I was organizing everything just as the Lord wanted. All of a sudden I heard a rebuke from one of our sisters, "Sister, how can you carry out such works?" I answered that it was not I, but the Lord working through me, and that I had the authorization for everything.